Here is a summarized version of the key events without the unnecessary details:
A few years ago, a strange man showed up at the OP's parent's house at 1am, looking for the OP using details about their life from 20 years ago. The man claimed the OP's "boyfriend" was worried because the OP didn't come home, but the OP didn't have a boyfriend.
A year and a half later, the OP's stepsister and her fiancé were at a party and met a woman whose ex-boyfriend was the OP's 10th grade boyfriend. This woman reported a similar incident where a man in a black hoodie was aggressively banging on her door at 1am, just like what happened to the OP's parents.
The OP plans to reach out to this woman and the 10th grade ex-boyfriend to try to get more information and figure out what's going on. The OP is concerned the 10th grade ex-boyfriend may be behind these strange incidents, potentially due to his history of obsession and harassment after their breakup.