首页 / 法律问答 / 我这样做是不是太过分了?我用你平时用来无视我的那个网站发帖告诉你我要跟你离婚。

我这样做是不是太过分了?我用你平时用来无视我的那个网站发帖告诉你我要跟你离婚。

商业律师 5 回答
Okay, here's the translated and humanized version of the text, removing unnecessary content and links: Hey Steffan, I hope you're finally listening now. And don't even think about rushing home to stop me, because I'm already gone. I packed everything into the car and left. I've taken my name off the lease, so you're on your own after next month's rent, "buddy." You're probably acting all surprised, like you have no idea why I'm doing this. Like you're such a great husband and soon-to-be dad, right? Well, let me spell it out for you: I'm 29, and I've been married to you, 35, for five years, together for almost ten. On paper, we looked great, but it was a nightmare. I've hit my limit, and I need to know if I'm crazy here. Your mom has been a monster since day one. She made our wedding all about her, wearing white and calling it a "family tradition" (it wasn't!). She constantly criticizes everything I do, from my cooking to my looks. I'll never forget when she called me fat in front of everyone. And you? You said nothing. It didn't stop there. She "accidentally" destroyed my things, including my grandmother's necklace, because she thought it looked cheap. She's gone out of her way to make me feel small and unwelcome. And every time I tried to talk to you about it, you brushed it off, saying I was overreacting. Then there's you. You're always on Reddit, giving strangers relationship advice, which is a joke considering how you treat me. You spend more time rating women's boobs than talking to me. Seriously. And just so you know, the last pair you rated weren't a 4 out of 10—they were a 10 out of 10. You have time for that, but you can't remember my birthday, our anniversary, or anything important to me. But you know your work schedule perfectly. When we fight, you get so hostile and always throw in that sarcastic "buddy" at the end of every sentence, like I'm some stranger you can barely tolerate. And you never clean. I do everything – the house, dishes, laundry. It's like you think being an adult is optional, as long as you have your job and Reddit. The final straw was a few weeks ago. I'm five months pregnant with our first child, a daughter. Your mom started making comments about how she'll have to "whip the girl into shape" and raise her to be "tough" because I'm "too soft." When I said I didn't want her to have too much influence on our daughter, especially with how she treats me, you just laughed and said she "means well" and I was "overthinking it." But what really broke me was when we were talking about childcare, and you suggested your mom should watch our daughter. I said I wasn't comfortable with that, and you snapped. You called me "paranoid" and said I should "get over it" because your mom was going to be a big part of our daughter's life whether I liked it or not. This is the same woman who thinks it's okay to hit kids. I've seen her hit your nephew for nothing, and nobody does anything about it. It's like you're all in a cult, and I'm finally waking up. If you won't stand up for me, how can I expect you to stand up for our child? I started to fear what kind of environment our daughter would grow up in – a place where she might be belittled by her own grandmother, with a father who wouldn't do anything about it. Oh, and you missed our first ultrasound because your mom "needed" you to fix her Wi-Fi. Wi-Fi! You chose that over seeing our daughter for the first time. That told me everything I needed to know about where I stand in your life. So, I packed up and left. I'm done living like this. And I've already contacted a lawyer. You can't scare me anymore, because I have all those texts. You know the ones I'm talking about. So, Steffan, I wish you all the best in your future marriage – with your mother and the women of Reddit whose boobs you don't even deserve. Am I the asshole for leaving my husband after years of neglect, mistreatment by his mother, and fearing for my daughter's safety? **Update:** Steffan saw this post. He's mad that someone found him because of the "rate my boobs" thing. He deleted his account. I want to make it clear that I left out any real identifying information that could lead to doxxing him. Anyone claiming to know me or have information about me is lying. I'm not from South Carolina, I'm not moving in with anyone, and I'm not sleeping around. **Update-ish:** Some people on Reddit are pretending to know me and spreading lies. They're saying I'm a deadbeat who doesn't work and that Steffan has two jobs to support me. They even made up a story about a neighbor saying I've been sleeping around and moving in with those guys. None of this is true. We don't live in South Carolina or the UK, and we're not friends with our neighbors. I've never cheated on Steffan, and I work and make slightly more than him. I think these claims are from trolls or Steffan's friends trying to make me regret posting this. I'm safe and staying with family. I'm working with my lawyer to make sure we're safe, and that's all I can say right now. For women in my situation dealing with a lease, talk to a lawyer who specializes in rental rights. That's what I did. They can give you advice for your area. I was able to move out because Steffan and I had both signed the lease and had completed the minimum rental period. I worked with my landlords to arrange my departure. So don't be scared. Or, you can be scared, but there are things you can do to protect yourself. Also, run a credit check on yourself – I did, and it's another issue I'm dealing with. Not much new has happened recently. Steffan is clearly desperate. He and his mom have both had meltdowns and started separate smear campaigns. His mom has spread lies, including that I'm an unfit mother. I'm not going to answer these claims publicly. I'm collecting all the evidence I have, especially since she has nothing to back up her accusations, but I have everything to back up mine. So, this isn't going to be a he-said, she-said situation. He deleted his Reddit account, claiming it was because someone found him. But then he told me people sent him death threats, which seems impossible. He did send his friends to my post, and I think they sent me some nasty messages. Allegedly. Whenever I tried to talk to Steffan, he always made me feel like I was going crazy. He'd dismiss my feelings and make me second-guess myself. For example, I'd come home to find he'd invited people over without telling me. When I brought it up, he'd say he did mention it, even though he hadn't. Another time, I planned a special meal and asked him for a specific dish, but he claimed I asked for something else entirely. When I reminded him of what I asked for, he'd argue that I must have forgotten. Steffan would also insist he had done tasks that I had actually done myself. For example, he would claim he had handled a household chore when I was the one who actually took care of it. When I pointed this out, he’d dismiss my recollection and insist that he had done it. Even in conversations about our relationship, Steffan would frequently deny things he had said or done. If I brought up issues I had with his mother’s behavior, he’d claim, “You never mentioned that before. You’re just being overdramatic.” This made me question whether I had ever truly discussed these problems or if I was indeed overreacting. At one point, I was so convinced that I had early-onset dementia or schizophrenia that I started to question my own sanity. I felt lost and confused, struggling to distinguish between reality and his version of events. I began to document our interactions just to keep track of what was actually happening. But Steffan would always find a way to twist things, saying, “You must be misremembering,” even though I had clear evidence to the contrary. Feeling so powerless, I realized that sharing my story online was the only way to present my truth in a manner he couldn’t manipulate. I wanted to ensure that there was a clear and unchangeable record of what had happened. Posting about my experiences was a crucial step in reclaiming my voice and finding support from others who might understand my situation. It was a way to take control of my narrative after feeling so lost and doubting myself for so long. Thank you all for your support during this difficult time.
回答次数 (5)
A
Ashley2
# 5
I'm always completely disgusted by the momma's boy threads.

🚩Adult spouse's parents have control over said spouse

🚩Spouse downplays parents' inappropriate behavior

🚩Spouse has no empathy for you after their family treats you poorly

If you're in that situation, stop wasting your time. Your spouse already chose their shitty family over you.

If you're that spouse, I hope you gain the self-awareness and strength to set boundaries.
倾城俊才
# 4
Do not comment on the original posts

Please read our sub rules. Rule-breaking may result in a ban without notice.

If there is an issue with this post (flair, formatting, quality), reply to this comment or your comment may be removed in general discussion.

CHECK FLAIR For concluded-only updates, use the CONCLUDED flair.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
冗酒
# 3
Best practice: Record conversations. Easier if you live in a one-party consent state in the US. Have done this, helps a lot to validate that you're not crazy, and bonus points! You can throw it back in their face later on and watch them have a meltdown about how you violated their trust/privacy because people like this never take accountability, but honestly the ensuing temper tantrum when they realize you've just delivered a massive "gotcha!" is sort of fun to watch. (Source: Personal experience.)
白兔糖
# 2
All these stories that begin, "I was a teenager and he was 25 when we began dating ... and I'm now surprised that he doesn't see me as an actual equal person with respect!" I knew a girl like that in HS. She was so booksmart that she was the valedictorian for our class and went to some Ivy League on scholarship; and couldn't understand why her 24 year old boyfriend wanted her to cook and clean for him. Otherwise, he was so mature! He had an apartment and a motorcycle!!

I'm sure some such relationships work out but it's gotta be unlikely.
N
NeoCrusader
# 1
I had a Steffan as a father. I was raised to basically shut the fuck up and agreeing to what he was saying. Men like this are crappy husbands, and worst fathers : it took me years to get that no I wasn't dumb and stupid and agressive ... my father just has no logic and no arguments to be right into a discussion. So he just "sush" me to get the power when we are speaking. He also verbally abused my mom a lot.

It broke me beyond imagination. I was depressed and suicidal at 11. I can't trust a man, and I feel like the dumbest person in the world. I have high anxiety, can't fight for my opinion without feeling like a burden and fear to be looked at for any reason. He insulted me of a pig, of autistic person (meant as an insult), and can't get that him cheating on my mom and my fav step mom made me root for toxic relationships. Your parents are supposed to be your first display of a healthy love, but my dad can't fathom to act responsible of his own actions even to save his own life.

But if you hear my father, I'm just in opposition just to bother him, or because my mom spwaned me to hate him. He can't fathom I can have my own opinion at 27 and just disagreeing with him.

Let's stop saying "women shouldn't cut a bad father out of her kid's life" and more "men should be fighting and deserving of a father title and aren't entitled to see their kids if they abuse them verbally and gaslight them during custody time".
北美法律通