: 我拒绝给儿子的妈妈更多监护权,因为她男朋友问我了,我这样做错了吗?
我和前任共同抚养一个8岁的儿子,我们一人一半时间照顾他,时间表安排得很细致,确保我们俩陪伴儿子的时间一样多。 去年,她想带儿子回老家过圣诞节,但只有我带儿子的那周有空,就问我能不能把我的圣诞周和她换一周。我答应了。结果她一直找借口不把那周还给我,总想按她的时间来,感觉被她骗走了和儿子相处的时间。 这事就算了。 这周,她又想让儿子和她过圣诞节(我圣诞节那周带,她之后那周带),还是为了回老家。我说可以,但你要还我两周,一笔勾销去年的,加上今年的。而且这两周必须在你多要时间之前给我,免得你再耍赖。其中一周可以是感恩节那周,反正那时候儿子跟你。 她不同意,还想忽悠我说去年那周已经还我了,真是睁眼说瞎话。我告诉她没得商量,要么接受,要么拉倒。 第二天,她男朋友给我打电话,说他打算感恩节求婚,所以她不想放弃感恩节。他们想一起回他家过圣诞和新年,庆祝订婚,这就是她非要我的圣诞周的原因。 我直接怼他,说我的抚养安排跟他没关系,我也不需要跟他解释。而且,我以后不会再同意任何变更了。让他转告我儿子他妈,别自找麻烦。现在他想收回之前说的话,因为他意识到插手这件事是错的。当然,他还说他只是想帮忙。
I'm a little conflicted. I was firm NTA til I got to the last paragraph but then it got questionable. I'm sorry OP but your custody arrangement absolutely IS his business. He is going be parenting your child a significant portion of the time. I'm sorry if you don't like that fact but that's the reality. He's marrying your ex and he is going to be your child's step-parent and is going to at the very least the male authority figure if not father figure at least half the time. If you didn't want that happening than you needed to work shit out with your ex. Obviously you didn't so now you have to deal with the fact that you are going to be sharing parenting responsibilities with this man. Your life and more importantly your child's life will be made better by that relationship being cordial. You don't have to give up Christmas but telling this guy it's none of his business is ridiculous.
: 别被威世智转移注意力!我们要继续关注撤销OGL 1.0a这件事!
Wizards is in damage control mode, releasing carefully worded statements, probably crafted by PR experts. They're saying they're listening to our concerns about the new license and want feedback before moving forward. But here's the core issue: they're trying to unilaterally revoke OGL 1.0a, a license supposedly meant to be irrevocable and which the community has treated as such for over 20 years. This is the real problem – a kind of "cultural vandalism." It's like catching a burglar. You don't negotiate; you don't make deals where you let them steal *some* of your stuff. That's what Hasbro's doing: trying to take control of a creative space they didn't previously own. Any discussion about the details of the new OGL is just haggling over how much they get to steal. Some say it's a done deal and Wizards won't back down. They might be right. OGL 1.0a helps their competitors, especially in the digital space where Wizards wants to build their own ecosystem. Getting rid of it is likely key to their plans, and maybe only a lawsuit can change their minds. Corporations expect community outrage, and the community's well-being comes second to profits. Hasbro's stock is down, and they're relying heavily on Wizards, which makes up 70% of their profit. Remember the "undermonetized" comment? It's true; D&D makes relatively little compared to similar brands. To them, there's untapped potential. Selling books to a fraction of the community isn't big business. But a subscription-based digital platform where everyone constantly spends money? That's what works in video games! So, these moves are sensible corporate policy: take back control of your brand and restructure it for more profit. OGL 1.0a is an obstacle they'll fight to remove, not because they're dumb or evil, but because it's the profitable thing to do. Why keep fighting then? Not to make them stop, but to make them *pay* for it. Revoking OGL 1.0a is theft, if not legally, then in spirit. We shouldn't let them get away with it. If they steal D&D, we should steal it back. Like Kleenex, we make it generic. Stop engaging with official products and flood social media with non-Wizards TTRPG content. Provide tools for players to continue their 5e games without paying Hasbro, or to switch to other systems. Support the new systems coming from Kobold Press, MCDM, and other independent creators filling the void left by Hasbro's greed. We all love D&D. But like any TTRPG, *we*, the players, make it magical, not the rule writers. If Hasbro tries to screw us over for profit, let them try. We own this game, and we won't let them have it. To be clear: Hasbro isn't being cartoonishly evil. They're corporate professionals making calculated moves to maximize shareholder value. Is what they're doing with 1.0a evil? Yeah, it's a massive dick move. So, fuck them.
Here's my official position: Fuck them. Well, if we all stay out of their walled garden (this is one case when I say it is unambiguously moral to go full variant sailor) and use any and every alternative they will regret their "reasonable" corporate policy. Because they will struggle to monetize a non existent customer base. Age of the ORC has come #openDnD
: 我结婚没考虑家人的时间安排,我这样做过分吗?
我和未婚妻在一起四年多了,一直想办个目的地婚礼。美国婚礼太贵了,我们又得自己掏钱,家里人都不帮忙。 一开始我们选了她老家墨西哥,结果我妈不乐意,说那地方没啥好玩的,配不上他们的“度假”。而且她觉得凭什么婚礼要在她家门口办,我家还得跑那么远?后来没办法,改成了意大利,对两边都“公平”点。我们还给直系亲属包了两晚住宿。 日期定了2023年10月,是我们五周年纪念日,提前一年半通知,够他们安排了吧?可我妈又炸了,说那天和我弟的橄榄球比赛冲突了,其他几个孩子也有活动。她骂我们自私,说我弟是四分卫,一场都不能缺席,否则就来不了婚礼。他们威胁说,除非改到夏天或者12月,否则就不来。但那样一来,花费就高多了,而且我们不想改,这个日子对我们有意义。现在他们还觉得我们是故意针对他们。 我真是太难了,我这人最怕冲突了,但这次我不想让步。其他人倒是挺支持的,四十多个人都开始订机票了,就我爸妈还没动静。我这样是不是太自私了?
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: 1) Picking a date for my wedding that interferes with my brother's school activities 2) My brother will not be able to attend my wedding Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ Subreddit Announcement The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit! Follow the link above to learn more I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
: 今天真倒霉!本来想去买个TT,结果碰上个“挡箭牌”。
我用主账号分享摄影作品,想尽量保持专业形象,所以用了小号。这事儿不算我平时在网上看到的那些离奇故事,但我觉得还是能在这里分享一下,你们自己判断吧。 我家住在那种只有一个便利店的小镇上。昨晚我开车去那里买套套,特意选了晚上,想避开熟人。结果一进门,发现收银的不是常常见到的店员,而是我家附近的一个老奶奶!以前见过她在这儿上班,但很少,尤其晚上更没见过。我没问啥,脑子里一直在想还要不要继续买。琢磨着老太太应该不会管一个她不熟的人买套吧。而且,为了不错失脱单的机会,我还是决定买! 于是,我走到柜台前,让她拿后面的套套。她突然停下眨眼,问我够不够年龄买这玩意。我皱着眉头问,买套还有年龄限制?她也皱着眉头问,我爸妈知不知道我半夜买套?(其实还没到晚上十点)我说,我买啥关别人屁事。她说,如果我用爸妈的钱买这种成人用品,那肯定关他们的事!我正想着怎么回怼,她拿起套套,指着包装上的情侣(半裸男女,快亲上了)让我好好看看,问他们看起来像我这么大吗。我耸耸肩,说我觉得他们只是很饥渴。老太太说:“再想想,年轻人。”我就说,反正不像你这么大,但就算你需要保护,肯定也想用吧。 这老家伙把套套放回架子上,说对我们这种年纪的孩子来说,最好的保护就是禁欲。说实话,当时气得想骂人,但还是忍住了,直接走了。出门后,我看到一个流浪汉站在街角,我认得他。接下来就是我们讨价还价。我给他钱,他帮我买套,剩下的钱归他。他同意了,我把钱给他,他进了店。 结果,流浪汉出来的时候,拿着一大包酸味软糖、两份报纸,还有一把新梳子!(我才知道那家店还卖梳子!)我问他套套呢,他说老太太(他还叫出了她的名字)说,如果他帮青少年买套,以后就别想喝她下次去救济站时带去的美味汤了。那一刻,我放弃了。我打电话给女朋友,说了情况。她说没套就不啪。所以,我就这样空着钱包,带着我的童贞回家了。第一回合,老奶奶赢了。但我还会再尝试的! 总结:我计划买套,安全地献出第一次。老奶奶计划阻止我献出第一次。老奶奶成功了。 **编辑:** 太疯狂了!上次看的时候只有2个赞,没评论。感谢大家的反馈。我同意你们说的关于老奶奶的看法。我不敢向经理举报她,因为他们都是一家人,我怕她会针对我。今天早上,流浪汉找到我,为花光我的钱道歉。他没直接说抱歉,但他给了我一个他用木头雕刻的匡威All Star球鞋,很酷。我看过他做的其他作品,他很有才华。总之,我这边有点晚了,但在睡觉之前,我想让你们知道,我还是弄到了一些套套,我和女朋友计划周末啪啪啪。希望一切顺利!
Fucking.... what, who placed that moron behind the counter. Its not her fucking business. Buying condoms has no age limit and its perfectly normal for a teenager to do so. She is bringing in her own personal opinions to CUSTOMERS. Im fucking fuming, go report her
: 说实话,那些嚷嚷着让菲洛尼和费儒取代凯瑟琳·肯尼迪担任卢卡斯影业总裁的人,根本不了解电影行业,也不清楚肯尼迪的工作内容。
最近 Reddit、油管和星战播客上总冒出个荒谬的说法,说什么卢卡斯影业内部有派系斗争,一边是 Favreau/Filoni 派,另一边是 Kennedy 派。我就不细说这有多离谱了,直接说说“Filoni/Favreau 应该取代 Kennedy 成为总裁”这个理论。 说白了,Kathleen Kennedy 是个纯粹的商人,而 Filoni 和 Favreau 是搞创作的。 Kennedy 的日常就是开会,讨论的估计都是电影制作的复杂融资方案,跟星战故事或者设定没啥关系。 Favreau 现在的位置就很理想,基本按自己的时间安排搞星战(除非在拍片),写剧本、出主意,推动星战的创意决策和故事走向。他还能拍漫威电影(演员和创意方面都参与),还能搞《主厨秀》这种自己喜欢的项目。 Kennedy 呢,每天早上 9 点上班,一整天都在开会,处理卢卡斯影业的各种事务,估计要忙到很晚。大家忘了,她可是世界顶级上市公司的高管,肩负着信托责任,这些东西 Favreau 和 Filoni 根本没兴趣学。 你们想让 Filoni 和 Favreau 负责星战的故事?没问题啊,他们已经在做了! Filoni 可是卢卡斯影业的创意总监! Kennedy 显然已经放权让他们主导很多剧集的故事了。 所以说,这个阴谋论可以和 2021 年一起过去了。 补充一下:这篇文章不是为 Kennedy 辩护,而是批评“Filoni/Favreau 应该取代她管理公司”这个说法。这完全是油管博主编出来的,简直是星战粉圈的 QAnon。 还有,那些嚷嚷着 Favreau 有能力胜任总裁的人,你们要知道,让他当总裁,他 50% 的时间就要用来谈判融资、医疗福利、特效合作、卢卡斯影业的房地产投资,还要向迪士尼董事会汇报。难道你们不想让他把时间花在编剧、导演和领导创意团队上吗?
I have worked in the industry and this position is wrong. Most execs in the industry do both creative and business work. Harvey Weinstein, while not a director, was famously deeply involved in the creative of his films. Many directors have gone on to be head studios. Brian Robbins, the current CEO of Paramount, was a director for most of his career. Lucas himself is probably the best example here, actually running this exact company while also directing the prequels. It is true that Filoni/Favreau certainly wouldn’t have the time to be as involved in the creative as they would if they were also the studio head, but the idea that they wouldn’t be involved in the creative at all, or that Kennedy isn’t, is the position that shows a misunderstanding of the job.
: “《模拟人生4》都10年了,为啥非洲大陆的文化元素还是这么缺失?模拟人生团队,我有个主意!”
Okay, here's a cleaned-up, more human-sounding version of the Sims 4 pack idea, focusing on an African-inspired world and music: **Music Fest Pack Idea** Imagine a Sims world inspired by the vibrant culture of Africa, where music is life! This pack would let your Sims become musicians, producers, or even run their own record labels. Players have been requesting band gameplay for a long time and I believe this pack will meet all expectations. **World & Locations** Think Lagos, Nigeria, or Cape Town, South Africa for location inspiration. Or, we could create a world with neighborhoods inspired by different cities across Africa, like a mix-and-match approach! **Careers** * **Solo/Band Musician (Active):** Start small performing at house parties, build your skills in instruments, singing, charisma, and entrepreneurship, make connections with promoters and producers and work your way up to headlining the Music Fest! Managing band relationships is also important! Practice with your band often. As you progress, you'll unlock bigger venues and special gigs. Reach level 10 to unlock unique career achievements, becoming a "Legendary Performer" or "Music Icon." You'll get to choose a main music genre and specialize in it. However if a Sim dislikes the primary music genre of the band, this could result in lower performance quality, slower skill progression, and no shows or disagreements during band practice. If a band member's relationship deteriorates with other band members, they will leave the group. * **Music Producer (Active):** Work behind the scenes, finding talent and turning them into stars. Skills needed are music, charisma, and logic. Find artists, record demos (maybe rent a studio at first), and promote their music. Eventually, you can build your own recording studio. The goal? Run your own record label, sign amazing talent, and host music awards! If you try to push an artist into a genre they dislike, it can cause problems. You also have to manage your reputation and the fame of your artists. Good relationships with promoters and media are key! * **Record Label Owner (Rabbit Hole):** Focus on the business side of the music industry. Sign artists, make key business decisions, and release music. **Aspirations** * **Successful Music Producer:** Master talent scouting and producing hit records. * **Successful Musician/Band Leader:** Achieve fame as a solo artist or band. * **Music History Buff:** Travel the world to learn about different music styles and traditions. **New Stuff** * **Music Genre:** Afro Beats! * **Skill:** Rapping and Beadwork * **Instruments:** African drums, Westernized drums, saxophone, harps, xylophone, and more. * **Death:** "Death from Too Much Music Fun"! Sims can get so caught up in the music that they, well, rock too hard and pass away. * **Fashion:** Afro-inspired clothing, hairstyles, jewelry, makeup, and face paint, plus fashion from different music genres. * **Food:** Jollof Rice, Bobotie, Ugali, Fufu and Soup. * **Animations:** Afro Beats dance moves, stage performances, crowd interactions. Also add basket balancing and cooking animations such as pounding Fufu. Also add audition animations. **World & Lots** * **Marketplaces:** Afro-inspired marketplaces for unique items, food, and clothing. * **Build Items:** New build items inspired from Africa, recording studios, and music festival. * **Music Fest Lot:** A unique space in the new world where Sims can headline as part of the musician career. Players can edit the lot similar to how they can edit high schools. Add lot traits so players can build this lot in other worlds! **Venue System** As you get better in the music career, you'll unlock new performance venues (lounges, clubs, etc.). Venues will be restricted based on career level. **Misc.** * Request a band to perform when hosting an event. * Can incorporate Magician or Acrobats, or other type of performers, etc similar to sims 3 showtime. * Dance group career (create a dance group and compete ) * Sell music albums **Family Dynamics** * Community Elder: option to select community elder as a family dynamic. A community elder is the one consulted on various matters, from conflicts to to celebration. * Wisdom Transfer: Elders can impart logic which in part increase younger sims logic skill. * Request a band to perform at weddings. * Lobola or Bride price interaction: Introduce a negotiation process for marriages **Pack Integrations** * **Get Famous:** Higher fame = more money and easier gigs. * **Get to Work:** Run a music store! * **Get Together:** Use clubs to practice with bandmates. * **City Living:** Perform at city festivals. * **High School Years:** Start a part-time band and perform at school events. Use thrift shop to create fashions that fans wear around town when you reach level 10 in the music career. * **Seasons:** Weather impacts festivals. Canceling gigs due to storms affects reputation. Create festival events like Calabar Carnival or Cape Town Jazz Festival. * **Life and Death:** "Mourn Through Music" interaction at graves. Bandmates get a mood boost from tragic loss. New musician tombstones. * **Wedding Stories:** Request a band to perform at weddings. Lobola or Bride price interaction. * **Growing Together:** Community Elder: option to select community elder as a family dynamic. A community elder is the one consulted on various matters, from conflicts to to celebration. Wisdom Transfer: Elders can impart logic which in part increase younger sims logic skill. **Other Notes** The codes from the 2021 in-game music festival and Sims 3 Showtime could potentially be reused to help develop this pack. Also, other sims can use the “Mourn Through Music” interaction at the grave, playing a song in memory of the Sim who rocked out a little too hard. *Inspired by Ultra South Africa Music Fest, u/sexy\_sadie\_69's music fest post, and u/dragonborndnd's continent picture.*
I agree! We really need an African pack. I swear, every time a new pack of any sort is announced, my mother gets annoyed it's not Africa. I'm not much of a music person myself, but I like your ideas. But some other ideas, just to keep this hypothetical pack from being too... one note (sorry): An African pack could also have a photo safari. Even if it was a rabbit hole like the tiger thing from For Rent, it could still come with collectables (photos, models/toys). It's my understanding that textiles are pretty important across Africa, so there could a new weaving skill and loom. It could also use wool from the llamas and sheep, just for cross-pack comparability. You could get both wall hangings and clothing out of it.
: 我中了个全新的热水浴缸,这玩意儿是不是那种华而不实,养起来又费劲的烫手山芋啊?我该留着还是卖掉呢?
Okay, so this person won a hot tub in a raffle, which sounds awesome, right? But then they started thinking about all the costs: running new electrical lines, pouring a concrete pad, and the monthly upkeep, especially with their electricity prices going up. One commenter mentioned they were paying around $200 a month just to run their hot tub in the winter! His wife suggested they sell it and take a trip. Lots of people chimed in with advice, mentioning things like permits, inspections, and even how a hot tub might affect resale value. Turns out, the spot they picked wasn't even big enough, and the new spot was in full view of the neighbors! Plus, they'd have to pay taxes on the prize, which could be a few thousand dollars. So, here's the clever part: He talked to the owner of the hot tub place and traded the hot tub for an indoor sauna! It's going in the basement, so no extra electrical work, and the upkeep is way cheaper. He's a little bummed about missing out on the hot tub, but still super happy he gets to come home to a nice sauna after snowboarding all day. Pretty smart solution!
Whoa. That dude is lucky! It’s supposed to be here tomorrow, or Friday. I can’t wait. Edit: just got the phone call it will be delivered next Tuesday now. Gonna be a long weekend waiting!
: 展望未来,我有一些想法想和大家分享。
Hey everyone, So, after that 13D filing today, I've been wondering why Ryan Cohen moved all those shares from his company to his personal account. I wanted to dig into similar situations in the past to see if we could get a hint of what might be coming for GameStop. I looked at moves by Elon Musk, Michael Dell, Carl Icahn, Patrick Byrne, and Warren Buffett. Here's what I found: * **Elon Musk:** Did this before the Tesla/SolarCity merger and again before selling shares to buy Twitter. * **Michael Dell:** Did it before taking Dell private and before the EMC merger. * **Carl Icahn:** Moved shares to launch a big shakeup at Herbalife. * **Patrick Byrne:** Did it before stepping down from Overstock and diving into crypto. * **Warren Buffett:** Consolidated his shares to take control of Berkshire Hathaway. **What did they DO after moving the shares and WHY?** * **Musk:** Merged Tesla with SolarCity and later sold shares for the Twitter deal. * **Dell:** Took Dell private to restructure and then merged with EMC to show commitment and simplify things. * **Icahn:** Restructured Herbalife. * **Byrne:** Left Overstock to invest in crypto. * **Buffett:** Took over Berkshire and shifted its focus. **How LONG did it take them to act?** * **Musk:** Weeks to months. * **Dell:** Six to nine months. * **Icahn:** Less than a year. * **Byrne:** A few months. * **Buffett:** Three to six months. **What does this mean for GameStop?** Based on these past situations, here are some possibilities: * **Cohen might buy more GameStop stock:** He might want to increase his stake. Given he has taken on the CEO role and Larry Cheng's comments, it would appear more likely he adds to the position. * **Cohen could take GameStop private:** It might be necessary for long-term growth, partnering with investors. We shareholders would need to approve it, and usually, offers like this are 20-30% above the current stock price, with a potential dividend. * **GameStop could merge with or acquire another company:** With its cash and a potentially friendlier M&A environment, GameStop might be looking to buy a profitable company to boost growth. * **Cohen might be planning a big strategy shift:** Similar to Buffett, he might be pivoting GameStop's core business. **In short:** Big CEOs often move shares before major company moves. This could mean adding to their position, going private, mergers, or overhauls. Sometimes, it means selling shares or stepping down. Given GameStop's cash and Cohen's commitment, it seems likely we'll see some big changes in the next year, likely within 3-6 months, which should be good for shareholders.
One correction. I see this frequently on these threads. For a buyout, the acquiring party doesn't pay a premium on cash. You don't buy cash-- you pay a premium on the valuation of the core business. A buyout would be incredibly negative for shareholders as that 20-30% premium would only cover the core business that is about $13/sh. That means whoever buys GME would be doing so at 15-17/share. I say this in hope that we can not promote this as a good thing. I like him buying more shares and acquiring other businesses. But selling the company at these premium levels (forward PE of nearly 200) would not be good for retail.
: 刚做了离职面谈,结果我老板花了30分钟攻击我,真是无语。
我离职了,第一份“正式”工作只做了半年,因为我找到了一个更好的机会。说实话,我当时应聘的职位就有点大材小用,之前还被更高一级的职位拒了,但明明我完全胜任。现在干着高出我职位的工作,拿着不相符的薪水。我本来挺喜欢这份工作的,因为我的经理和同事们都很棒,所以想留下来。 结果,突然有个新工作机会砸到我头上,我一下子就犹豫了。新工作薪水更高,也更符合我的职业规划,但我知道我会怀念现在的工作环境。不过最终我还是决定离开了。我提前两周通知了离职,还主动提出如果需要可以多留一段时间。我跟经理说,我真的很喜欢在这里工作,但新工作对我来说更有发展前景。 今天是我离职面谈的日子,我的经理和老板(公司很小,所以老板也在)都在。老板这周一直躲着我。他们问了一些常规问题,比如“我们有什么可以改进的地方?”我说,其实没什么,只是我有点大材小用了,而且刚好有个更好的机会,对我的职业发展很有帮助。我很诚实地说,我知道我会很怀念这里的工作环境,但这是我为了自己的未来必须做出的选择。 结果,老板突然爆发了。他开始滔滔不绝地指责我,说我应该告诉他们我在考虑其他工作机会,如果我提出来,他们可以给我升职;他还说,从来没有人只提前两周通知离职,说我完全不顾公司的利益,辜负了他们对我的“投入”。所以,我当初应聘更高职位被拒,反而应该觉得有晋升空间,这逻辑我也是服了!而且,他在商界打拼了20年,竟然从来没有人只提前两周通知离职?真的假的?我跟经理说过我可以多留一段时间,但他觉得两周就够了,还说他很高兴我找到了好机会,但我跟老板解释的时候,他根本不听。 然后,他又开始说,以后没人会想雇我,因为我没有在一个公司待满一年,还说我“这样离职是拿不到好推荐信的”。我真的不知道我应该怎么做才对——我没有任何迹象表明可以谈判,而且我知道他们不可能给我涨30%的工资。我又不是在这家公司工作了几十年,他的“投入”根本不值一提。 我以为我的经理会帮我说几句话,但他却一言不发,这让我更难受。我不争气地哭了出来,眼泪止不住地流,整个过程都太尴尬了。 我也不知道自己想表达什么,只是觉得很生气、很沮丧,想发泄一下。大家觉得我这样做很过分吗? 好吧,我承认,我当时应该直接走人的。说起来容易,做起来难啊! 你们说的对,我的经理也没做错什么。我当时觉得被背叛了,但他只是想保住自己的工作。他仍然是个好人。 还有那些嘲笑我哭的人,下次我会故意哭给你们看的!
I just have to say this (not as criticism, but as a reminder) - this was abuse. You don’t ever have to sit through abuse. The owner had a tantrum. The entire working world has gotten way too used to the notion that employees are available to be abused whenever they feel like it. It is important to push back against this. In this particular situation you didn’t really have much to loose. What was he gonna do, fire you? I know it’s very difficult because we’ve all been trained that we have to take abuse from authority figures, but what you do when someone starts yelling is stand up and politely and calmly say that you will not be spoken to that way, and then you leave. (And he’s full of shit. He knew you were over qualified when he hired you and chose not to promote you or give you a raise.)
: 我因为全家人得知我老婆怀孕后就集体不参加我的婚礼,而拒绝让他们见我的女儿,我这样做是混蛋吗?
我来自一个非常保守的基督教家庭,家里人都积极参与教会活动,甚至在教会工作。我和妻子交往两年后订婚,当时已经发出了婚礼请柬,之后我们发现她怀孕了,还是决定按原计划在她怀孕五个月的时候举行婚礼。 没想到,这事儿让他们勃然大怒。他们质问我们是否还要结婚。我说为什么不呢?但他们,尤其是爸妈,非常不满,说他们一直以体面和良好的基督教价值观著称,不愿意让这件事“玷污”他们的名声,也就是我们未婚先孕这件事。他们正式宣布退出婚礼,拒绝沟通,说一切都已成定局,责任在我,还让我把婚礼搬到外地去办。我当时很受伤,试图说服他们,也和其他家人沟通,结果: 我哥说他不想在教会成员面前像个笑话,也退出了;我姑姑装病,说可能来不了,但她身体好得很;我表哥说要出差,还阻止他老婆孩子参加;我叔叔更是对我破口大骂,撕了请柬,把我赶了出去。 婚礼上没有一个家人支持我,分享喜悦,我感觉糟透了,仪式后甚至崩溃大哭。几个月来我都没和他们说话,后来又忙着照顾刚满月的女儿。 突然有一天,我表哥来给我送礼,说是家里人给女儿的祝福。我把东西都退了回去。他代表家人劝我,说我不应该退掉礼物,毕竟是家人送的,他们想见女儿,想参与她的生活。他说我妈特别想见外孙女,其他人也想尽快来庆祝孩子的出生。我问他:“当初不就是因为我女儿,你们才抛弃我的婚礼吗?” 他一脸不高兴地看着我,我接着说他们当初把我女儿当成见不得人的东西,想藏起来(以后女儿肯定会问起婚礼的事,我不想骗她)。他保证说我误会了,还说无论我们之间发生什么,都不能否认我女儿是他们的孙女/侄女/外甥女,他们是她的家人。他让我安排他们来探望,但我拒绝了。他一直劝说,但我还是不同意。我老婆觉得应该让他们来,但我仍然拒绝。
NTA Do not let your toxic family around your baby, at all! The way they treated you for getting married while expecting was disgraceful. They viewed her existence before the wedding as shameful, abandoned you, your Uncle cursed you out (that’s not very Christian of him!), etc. Yet now that your daughter is born they want to rugsweep how awful they behaved, refuse to actually apologize, and feel entitled to be a part of her life. Don’t let these people with their fickle conditional “love” have the chance to hurt your daughter too. They may be blood but that doesn’t make them family. Your wife’s family stood by your too, which is a marked difference in behavior! nomatter what goes down between us I can never deny that my daughter is their granddaughter/niece/etc and they're her family. And tell your cousin, “So? No matter what you say, you will never be a part of her life. I will not allow it. I’m the parent so what I say goes. Stop contacting me.”
: 我的新老板我都没见过,就让我去他家,这正常吗?我该担心吗?
Okay, so this person got a remote job offer, but things got weird fast. No paperwork, no background check, and now the "boss" wants them to come to their house for training. Super sketchy, right? They were uneasy about it, especially since the job was supposed to be remote and there was no mention of travel. They asked the boss if they could meet somewhere else, but the boss insisted on their house and said it was crucial for training. Everyone online is telling them to run far, far away. It's a huge red flag. One person even said they'd flatten their tires if they tried to go! They suggested offering to meet in a public place instead. **Update:** So, the person told the "boss" they felt unsafe, and the boss offered to pay for a ride to their house! When they still refused and asked about a remote or public meeting, the boss basically said, "Come to my house alone or you don't get the job." They claimed "information privacy" as the reason, which makes no sense for a customer service job. The boss then said they were questioning them as a candidate because of the safety concerns. The person is obviously not going and wanted to warn others. They're thinking about reporting them to the job site where they found the listing.
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: 关税对爱荷华州的影响是实实在在的。农产品出口受阻,农民收入减少,一些行业也面临成本上升的压力。总的来说,日子不好过。
好啊,爱荷华的伪基督徒、法西斯、种族主义者们,你们的报应来了。 为了那点鸡蛋和汽油出卖自己,现在你们卖的每一样东西都要遭殃了。鸡蛋已经涨了40%(之前是36%),这周盯着油价吧!各大对冲基金都在做空市场。 加拿大和墨西哥开始征收25%的报复性关税,爱荷华州的经济要遭重了,农业、制造业、能源、消费品,哪个都跑不了。 农业是重灾区。爱荷华州严重依赖农产品出口,加拿大和墨西哥是两大买家。关税一上来,需求肯定减少: * 猪肉和牛肉:墨西哥是美国猪肉的最大进口国,大部分来自爱荷华州。关税让爱荷华猪肉更贵,墨西哥人可能转头买欧洲或南美的,爱荷华农民要赔死了。 * 玉米和大豆:加拿大和墨西哥都进口爱荷华州的粮食喂牲口。现在关税一搞,他们肯定少买,爱荷华农民本来利润就薄,这下更难了。 * 乳制品:加拿大也可能限制从爱荷华州进口乳制品,本来牛奶价格就低,这下更雪上加霜。 * 乙醇:爱荷华州是乙醇生产大户,加拿大和墨西哥也是大买家。关税会让需求减少,玉米价格下跌,农民遭殃。如果他们转向巴西等其他国家,爱荷华州的乙醇产业可能长期萎缩。 制造业和供应链也完蛋。 * 农机设备(约翰迪尔):约翰迪尔在爱荷华州有工厂,依赖从北美进口钢铁和铝。美国的关税已经抬高了他们的成本,现在加拿大和墨西哥的关税又会减少他们的农机销量。 * 汽车和机械出口:爱荷华州也生产机械和汽车零件,出口到加拿大和墨西哥。关税一来,需求减少,可能要裁员或减产。 * 能源成本上升:爱荷华州的制造业和农业都依赖能源。加拿大是美国原油的主要供应国,贸易中断可能导致汽油和柴油价格上涨。农民用柴油开拖拉机,运输货物,成本都要增加。物流成本也会上涨,把爱荷华州的产品运到市场更贵了。 爱荷华州的物价和通货膨胀也要上天。 进口和出口都面临25%的关税,爱荷华州商品价格可能上涨: * 设备和车辆更贵(因为从加拿大/墨西哥进口的机械和钢铁要加关税)。 * 食品更贵,尤其是那些依赖北美原料或加工的产品。 * 能源成本上升,汽油、暖气、消费品运输都要涨价。 * 供应链中断,爱荷华州的家庭买日常用品更贵了。 贸易转向和其他长期后果。 * 永久性市场损失:如果加拿大和墨西哥转向其他供应商,即使以后取消关税,爱荷华州的生产商也很难夺回市场份额。 * 乙醇市场中断:如果墨西哥和加拿大从其他地方购买乙醇,爱荷华州在这个行业的地位可能会永久削弱。 * 投资不确定性:依赖出口的爱荷华州企业可能会暂停扩张、减少招聘或削减投资,因为他们担心贸易紧张局势会持续下去。 爱荷华州的政治和经济压力。 * 农民和制造商可能推动政策变化:爱荷华州的农业和制造业具有重要的政治影响力。当地的企业领导人和农民可能会加大对立法者的压力,要求他们谈判达成豁免或新的贸易协议。 * 对爱荷华州摇摆州地位的影响:由于爱荷华州是一个政治敏感的州,贸易紧张局势可能成为一个主要的竞选议题,影响地方和国家选举。 总而言之,爱荷华州要倒大霉了。报复性关税全面生效,爱荷华州面临双重打击——美国对进口商品征收关税导致成本上升,外国对出口商品征收关税导致销量下降。农业部门首当其冲,能源、制造业和消费者也深受其害。如果关税长期存在,爱荷华州的经济可能会出现失业、农业收入下降、能源成本上升和投资减少。 为了更便宜的鸡蛋和汽油,你们出卖了自己、出卖了社区、出卖了国家,现在鸡蛋和汽油都要涨疯了。 周末看到你们在Costco囤鸡蛋了。 你们知道报应要来了,但就是不承认。 再怎么祈祷、再怎么往功德箱里扔钱,也无法弥补你们的罪过。 这些罪孽不会被赦免,不会被原谅。 继续自欺欺人吧,等着在生活的方方面面陷入绝望吧。 祝你们今天愉快,好好享受你们的报应吧。 *补充:特朗普谈下来的那些协议,根本就没啥实际意义,没钱。那些“成果”人家本来就要做的。那特朗普到底在图啥?特朗普和MAGA们吹嘘的加拿大13亿美元边境计划,早在12月初就宣布了。干得漂亮,拜登!
Traditionally, in the past, Iowa has been a bit sheltered from economic shocks. We haven't suffered the cost of living crisis in the same way the East and West Coast has. The 2008 financial crash hit us hard but not as hard as it did on the coasts. This one is gonna fucking nail us. Jesus fucking Christ, why didn't the right listen? When us on the left kept saying, he's serious he means what he says he is going to do that shit....so many people called us doomsdayers and alarmist. Look, I'm not speculating, I'm taking Trump at his word. After J6 how the hell can anyone NOT take Trump seriously? We told you he is gonna do the things he said he was gonna do for the last 2 years. And now he his making good on his promises. And so many people are shocked. Goddamn it
: 我从瑞士飞纽瓦克,坐的是商务舱,他们问我是否愿意放弃座位,补偿是10万里程或者2000美元的代金券。我该选哪个?能要求更多补偿吗?
航空公司把我的商务舱机票改期了,虽然出发时间和飞行时长没变,但日子不一样了。 不过他们给了我5000美元的代金券,让我第二天再坐商务舱走。我原本的往返机票花了7700美元,虽然是临时订的,但因为我是个体户,可以把机票算成商务支出。 另外,我算了算,用全日空的里程换美联航的商务舱更划算,所以没要美联航的积分。我查了下,下个月我想去的地方,美联航商务舱机票大概要18万积分起。 非常感谢大家的建议!
You've flown 19 international business class trips with United this year, and they asked you? Yikes, that's bad on their part. Agree with others that you should hold out for far more and make sure they know how much spend you do with United. Are they asking you to fly economy on the same flight? Or putting you on another flight in business class?
: 我最近老是面试,但其实都没打算去。
我最近迷上了一个奇怪的爱好:假装找工作。 过去几个月,我一直在Indeed上投简历,编造各种资历。从纸面上看,我就是完美的候选人,但实际上,我根本不存在。 你可能想知道我为什么要这么做。其实,我只是喜欢打扮得漂漂亮亮的,这让我感觉像参加一个重要的活动。我可以享受美好的一天,去新的地方逛逛。我会去理发店刮胡子,买早餐和咖啡,感觉自己棒极了,看起来也很精神。 走进面试房间时,我非常平静,因为我根本不在乎是否能得到这份工作。我会完全颠倒过来,反问他们公司有什么福利,我为什么要为他们工作,以及他们公司相对于当地其他企业的优势。 面试官的反应各不相同,有的一脸困惑,有的则试图说服我加入他们。 然后,我就会抛出重磅炸弹。当谈到薪资时,我会说这个薪资在今天的市场上没有竞争力,然后装出一副不耐烦的样子,感谢他们的时间,直接走人。 有好几次,我收到邮件,邀请我参加第二次面试,说薪资突然可以商量了。 我知道我这样做可能有点问题。但我相信,下一个去面试的人会有更好的体验。 我并不担心有什么后果,因为我不需要工作。我现在是一名全日制大学生,毕业后打算移民。 我会录下我的下一次面试。
I would not say I do the same, but every time I get new certificate or something happen worth of updating CV, when I upload it to Monster, Indeed, ... (logic here - its better to keep it tidy and spend 20-30min monthly then spend days every couple of years) , their algorithm puts my profile on the top. And then the fun begins with tons of insane recruiters who are offering beginner roles, have crazy expectations or similar shait. So, when I filter them down, usually there is one or two offers which sounds OK, so I go to the interviews hoping they will give "offer that cannot be refused" but every time they fail badly.
: 嘿,房地产界要变天啦!美国房地产经纪人协会(NAR)准备取消6%的佣金规定了!想知道这事儿对咱们老百姓有啥影响?往下看就明白了。
美国房地产经纪人协会要取消6%的佣金了!这会带来什么影响呢? 以后美国的房产中介得靠本事吃饭了,佣金肯定会降下来。据说佣金可能会降30%,房价也会跟着降。 美国的房产佣金一年差不多有1000亿美元,降个30%的话,买家和卖家一年就能省好几百亿呢!比如,卖一套50万美元的房子,佣金从6%降到3%,就能省下9000美元甚至更多。 这事儿肯定会影响房价,对整个美国房地产市场都是个大冲击,有专家说这可能是百年来美国房地产市场最大的一次震动。经济学家也说,这能帮美国房主每年省下不少钱。 所以,如果你最近要卖房,我建议你等等,看看新的低佣金模式出来后再挂牌,或者狠狠地跟中介砍价!
The only thing this did was hurt the lower income and/or first time homebuyer. That person that can barely scrape together any kind of down payment now has to come up with money to pay buyers agent and that money CAN NOT be financed. For those who say they don’t need to pay a buyers agent…you’re wrong in most cases. Many people that have no idea how the home buying process works will get screwed by not knowing their rights, the questions to ask and the proper inspections and deadlines associated with them. They will be taken advantage of in many cases. No, I’m not a realtor but I know the processes involved. The only winners in this were the lawyers.
: 如果邻居把球踢到我家院子里,我可以把球留下吗?
这邻居真是让我头疼死了!他在院子里搞足球培训,天天吵得要命,低音炮震天响。更过分的是,足球老踢到我家花园,花都给我砸坏了。他自己还跑到我家地里捡球,翻我栅栏,简直忍无可忍! 最近更离谱,他(或者他学生)竟然把我的栅栏铁丝都给掰弯了,方便他们捡球,掰完就那样扔着不管。要不是我发现得早,我家狗都跑丢了!我跟他说了好几次音乐的事,这次又跟他说了栅栏的事,让他别再来我家捡球了,我会把球还给他。他倒好,直接无视我,继续翻我栅栏。 我也不想当个事儿妈,可那些球砸到我家房子了,砸坏我家植物了,他还把我家栅栏弄坏了,还差点害我家狗跑丢。监控还拍到他晚上跑到我家房子一米内捡球,真是太过分了! 我现在就想问问,我可以把跑到我家院子里的球都扣下吗?反正他也不一定马上来捡,我有时间把它们拿走。这算偷吗?还是说他活该?我继母说把球扎破再还给他,我觉得有点过分了。 大家说我该怎么办? 补充一下,球门后面确实有个12英尺的网对着我家,我们边界上还有个6英尺的PVC围栏。问题是他的院子太小了,根本不适合搞足球培训。球一天被踢到我家这边成百上千次。他自己场地不够用,就想占我家便宜。我前面的栅栏就是个普通的铁丝网,4英尺高,用铁棍固定。不值什么钱,我把它掰回去也不费劲。我生气的是他不尊重人,把栅栏掰弯了就那样扔着,差点让我家狗跑了。我估计也不能让他赔栅栏的钱。 我又查了下镇上的 zoning 法规,感觉他在这儿搞商业活动可能不合法。就算他有特殊许可,噪音什么的也不能超出他家范围。他家地盘根本不够他折腾的。我本来不想直接找政府,怕把关系搞僵,以后见面更尴尬。但如果他一直不理我,那我可能也没办法了。
Call your town or city’s nonemergency police line and explain the problem. Ask what they would suggest you do about the trespassing and the property damage, nd ask about laws pertaining to noise and running a business in one’s home in your area. Does zoning allow for that? Is a license required? You can also start taking pictures of the damage from the balls to your garden, home, fence, etc. and then file a claim against his homeowner’s insurance or business insurance. Put up a couple more cameras covering more angles, and get motion detector floodlights that will illuminate him if he trespasses in the backyard again. You may be able to negotiate with him to fix the damage he’s caused, and then force him to apply for a variance, if necessary, to install a higher fence to protect your property from his business activities. I’m guessing you are not in an HOA area, because if you were, you could have shut this shit down already. The only benefit to an HOA is being able to sic them on nuisances like this.
: 想找当家的?行啊,我来跟你谈!
想起几年前的一件事,现在想起来都觉得好笑。 我家住的小区人来人往,经常有人上门推销。一般来说,他们都挺客气的,我愿意听就听,不愿意他们也不会纠缠。 我们家的水电煤气账单都归我管,因为我是家里的“财政大臣”,对各种优惠门儿清。每年都是我来决定用哪家公司,货比三家,找最划算的。我清楚地记得每个合同到期的日子,然后有条不紊地更换供应商。有时候我会直接跟上门推销的人谈,有时候就在网上或者电话里搞定。 有一次,一个推销水电煤气的人来敲门,正好赶上我们家合同快到期的时候。他一开口就问:“你好,男主人在家吗?” 我当时就有点不高兴了,我说不在。他又问我男主人什么时候回来。我说他上班去了,不过5点以后会回家,欢迎他那时候再来。那人把时间记下来,点点头就走了。 果不其然,5点以后他真的来了,跟我老公聊了起来。我老公很不耐烦地问他为什么不直接跟我说。他立马改口问我是否在家。可惜我当时不在,要很晚才回去。我老公就让他明天再来试试看。 第二天早上,我特意在家等着他。我端着一杯茶,笑眯眯地感谢他提醒我该看看有什么优惠了。然后告诉他,就在他来之前几个小时,我已经在网上换成了他们公司的服务。然后我愉快地跟他说了声“再见”。 我觉得他肯定损失了两笔生意,因为我把家里的天然气和电都换成了他们家的。
I grew up fixing mowers, and we'd get slow in the winter. My grandpa would canvas neighborhoods, especially on Saturdays when people were more likely to be home, and he taught me how to do it. In the mid to late 80s I was ten, I would ask for the man of the house. I noticed that more women were mowing the lawn and being the head of household, so I shifted away from that phrase. For anyone who does door to door pitches, learn to not be pushy. Pushing someone who is unsure will only make them not buy from you. If you feel someone is iffy, ask if you can leave them some information and move on. Maybe you get a bite, maybe you don't, but at least you're not eating extra time that could be spent getting to someone who DOES buy.
: 我这样做对吗?我打断了儿子的约会,让他去接他妹妹。
我是个43岁的单亲爸爸,有两个孩子,17岁的Max和8岁的Liza。 我通常让Liza参加课后俱乐部,这样我下班后就能直接去接她。但昨晚我不得不加班,虽然努力争取了,但经理说任务必须当晚完成。 眼看快到6点了,我知道自己赶不上了,就打电话给Max,让他去接Liza。他说他不行,因为他和女朋友在约会,庆祝他们交往六个月。我说我理解,但我真的需要他去接Liza,我会补偿他的。 他生气地挂了电话,我以为他虽然生气,但还是决定去接妹妹。 半小时后,我接到Liza学校的电话,问我人在哪里,因为学校快关门了,一个人都没有了。 幸好Liza一个朋友的妈妈说她可以送Liza回家,这才没事。 不过,我不太喜欢Liza和那个朋友一起玩,不是因为那个朋友,而是因为她妈妈。她有个习惯,总是在车里问Liza一些她不会的数学题,然后批评她。这很伤人。 我打电话给Max,问他人在哪里,说他回家后就惨了。他只是告诉我他很忙,让我“别烦他”。 他晚上9点左右才回家,我告诉他禁足,并且三个星期内不准开车。他听了就火了,说我当父母失败,没钱请人接Liza,不关他的事。 我想听听大家的看法,我是不是太严厉了?打断他的约会,我错了吗? 补充说明:这是在过去一年半里,我第三次请Max接妹妹。有人问我为什么不请保姆,因为经济很拮据。 Max和Liza的妈妈不在我们的生活中。我没有想过和其他家长搞好关系,因为我大部分时间都在工作,除了每年一次的家长会,没有时间。 请不要侮辱我的儿子。
So here's the thing: I get Max's response. Our kid is 19. I was 16 once. I get it. I really do. But the OP made arrangements that were supposed to work and then something dropped on his lap. Whether we like it or not, this happens. When it happens families ought to be a team. And in this case the team needed Max to go and get his sister. Again, max is 16. Our kid has gone 8 hours without returning texts, but these were about simple things like "you coming home for dinner?" or what have you.. not "I'm stuck at work.. etc". Anyway, NTA. Caught in a shit situation that could happen to any of us. Yeah. FINAL THOUGHT: The people who are like "oh she had to be asked math questions boo hoo"? Yeah, I failed/nearly failed every math class I've ever taken. Being quizzed on math by some random mom who then mocked my ability to answer the questions? I'm 53 now. I reckon that would drive me to drink and, theoretically, I have coping skills.
: “你们是怎么应对那种付得起我的时薪,却总把每月的账单当成生意来砍价的客户的?”
别总想着保险公司,把客户当成那些有点钱的中产商人,比如遇到合同纠纷了,或者像公寓委员会那样。
Institutional clients are different, but with individual clients and business lit that was more on the “one off” side, the thing that generally kept me out of these situations, I think, is that I was always pretty good at giving the client a real good idea what was going to be required and what it would cost over what period of time. If something crazy happened, I communicated that to the client well in advance of sending out a bill that would decapitate them. I generally would make sure my estimates were going to err on the high side if they erred at all. If I just flat missed an estimate because there was an aspect I hadn’t considered due to my own lack of experience, I generally ate that time and let the client know it by writing it off the bill. It doesn’t take most clients long to recognize and appreciate that a professional is treating them fairly. By the same token, it doesn’t take them long to SUSPECT that they may be being taken advantage of if the communication sucks and the lawyer does “block billing” (ie, 25 tasks lumped together with a single time entry at the end). I did not love working on the insurer side in the early part of my career, but it was great training in defensive billing. Those MF’rs treated bill reduction like a sport.
: 我拒绝帮我哥,因为他老婆到处乱说我的经济状况,我这样做过分吗?
几年前我中了彩票,这辈子都够花了。虽然我的名字和奖金是公开记录,但我还是努力保密。基本上还算成功。兑奖后,我设立了一个信托,然后告诉了家人。 我的计划是根据需要帮助我的三个兄弟和父母。我哥哥克里斯和他的妻子爱丽丝有三个孩子,我主动提出帮他们支付一套房子的首付。说起来可笑,我中奖后的第一年比中奖前还穷,因为我一直在帮助我的家人。 我给所有接受我钱的人立了一条规矩——不要告诉任何人我中彩票的事。结果克里斯和爱丽丝为了炫耀,把事情说了出去,然后就有一大堆人开始向我索要钱财。这些都是他们的朋友、朋友的朋友、姻亲等等。比如我哥哥的小舅子,九年来我和他见过两次面,他竟然让我为他在圣卢西亚举办的婚礼买单,就因为他的未婚妻想要在那儿办。虽然这件事发生在2021年,但直到现在还有人不断地骚扰我,向我要钱。 我当时很生气,就断绝了和哥哥的来往。这导致了家庭的破裂,我和他们基本上疏远了。这很不幸,因为我非常疼爱我的侄子们,想好好地宠他们。 上周,我的另一个兄弟给我发邮件说,克里斯今年一直生病,卧床不起,需要特别护理,好像是呼吸方面的问题。我说这很令人难过。他说克里斯和爱丽丝要失去房子了,因为克里斯一直没工作。他们有四个孩子,年龄从4岁到15岁不等。我告诉他,有什么话就直说吧。他问我是否愿意帮他们支付未偿还的账单,直到他们重新站稳脚跟。 我说不。钱不是问题,问题是我的隐私。我不知道他们是否会闭上嘴不谈论我对他们的帮助。我会被描绘成一个“有钱的好人”,然后就会有10个人来找我解决他们的问题。你帮助他们一次,他们就会一直回来找你。当你在帮助别人时,人们碰巧遇到经济紧急情况,这真是太可笑了。 另一个问题是,如果我的哥哥去世了,我不想让爱丽丝得到一套我支付了20%的房子的。我和她关系不好,而且是她把我的事情泄露出去的。她非常肯定我会照顾他们,以至于她甚至没有说一句“谢谢你为我们的梦想之家支付了首付!” 他们的经济状况有多糟糕?非常糟糕。我愿意以其他方式提供帮助,但乞丐却想当主人,还想跟我商量慈善事宜。 我不会和我哥哥和他的妻子达成某种贷款协议。他们没有能力偿还我,而且会认为这是一种示弱。具有讽刺意味的是,唯一一个反对给他们钱的人是我的财务顾问。 我给了他们42万美元买房,他们却把事情搞砸了。他们住的房子比我还好。我生活得很朴素。我没有劳力士手表,我的衣服上有洞。我的家具是从Big Lots买的。 我不帮忙的另一个原因是,我知道如果角色互换,他的妻子肯定不会帮助我,而且态度会更恶劣。我爱我的侄子们,但我不会被他们勒索。当他们长大成人并联系我时,我会在那里支持他们。
ESH Alice is the AH for not being able to give you some basic respect and privacy. Your ask was not too big. From your intense feelings I am wondering if you ever liked her or if she always sucked. You're an AH for caring more about your pride than the fact that kids you claim to care about and your brother who is too sick to get out of bed may end up homeless. She already blabbed and the damage on that end is done. If you care about your brother's kids, consider what they see happening and how they will feel about you one day. I am not saying to let yourself be run over, but maybe offer some grace in a time of need. You don't need to forget her screw up, but maybe put it aside for the moment. It doesn't even have to start out as financial, but make a meal and drop by to chat with your brother and his kids, then ask yourself what you actually want to happen here and what help you're willing to offer. Also, maybe talk to a therapist to help yourself figure out what outcome you want. Reddit doesn't know you and there is a bunch to unpack.
北美法律通