我和前女友分手五年后又在一起了。我们大学时开始交往，都是彼此的初恋，还同居了一年。她毕业后在教育部工作，但她不甘于现状，我也鼓励她去追求更好的发展。她考上了一个很棒的法学院，我们都很开心。但后来她开始犹豫，先是问我是否能接受未来三年“被放在次要位置”，然后又说要和我分手，说是为了我好，因为她没时间谈恋爱。 我从她的朋友那里听说，她喝醉后说我人很好，但她不能想象和一个护士约会，而她自己以后可是要当律师的。我当面质问她，她矢口否认，我选择了相信她。 在法学院期间，我们偶尔会聊几句。她说没空谈恋爱才和我分手，结果三个月后就发了和另一个男人的合照，而且那男的根本不是法学院的，这让我很受伤。 后来我move on了，也交往过一些人，还拿到了护理专业的硕士学位，现在过得也不错。我看到她在一家大公司当法律分析师，也为她感到高兴。我们重新联系上，她现在和我住在一起。 我之前的很多担心，比如她觉得我配不上她，或者因为我是护士而不开心，现在看来都是错的。我以为只是异地恋太难了。 后来，我和一位从事法律工作的表亲聊了聊，才知道法律分析师基本上不可能成为律师，而且很多这样的工作不需要法学学位也能做。 我问她这件事，因为之前她只是顺着我说，说我知道她现在挣得不多，但以后会升职的，可以从法律分析师升到律师事务所的合伙人。这次我问她，她承认了，说她的法学学位没用，必须从排名前14的学校毕业才有机会，而且她也当不了执业律师，最多只能在一家普通公司升到总法律顾问。 我问她现在挣多少，她说每小时22美元……当我问她欠了多少债时，她开始哭了。她问我，如果她告诉我一个很大的数字，我会不会离开她？她说她从来没让我帮她还过钱，那是她自己的负担。我当时太难受了，说不下去了。后来我再提起这件事，她又开始哭。 我想知道她的财务状况，因为我们会一起规划未来，她的钱也会影响到我们的生活。她花的钱，就不能用在我们共同的未来上。说实话，我并不介意她挣得不多，或者不能像她说的那样成为年薪60万美元的合伙人。 但我之前的那些感觉又回来了，她当初离开我是不是因为“我只是个护士”？她现在和我在一起，是不是因为她的律师梦破灭了，而我只是她最好的选择？她之前还说过，玩TikTok让她觉得自己老了。我和这份法律助理的工作，是不是只是她的Plan B？ 被她甩了之后，我有很多不安全感，不知道该怎么办。我觉得如果我和她谈，她只会说些好听的话来哄我。我该怎么办？我该怎么和她提起这件事？如果我和她在一起，我能放下自己是备胎的想法吗？

我今年27岁，在东南一家律师事务所做能源律师。我计划再干一年就去国民警卫队。之后可能会考虑去政府部门。 关于加入国民警卫队，我纠结于是直接入伍还是去军官候选学校 (OCS)。我对步兵最感兴趣，也考虑过装甲兵或者情报部门。我不想在警卫队里还是做文书工作，所以不考虑当军法官。 我应该直接申请 OCS 吗？我最终想成为一名步兵军官，但没有服役经历，不知道是不是应该先入伍学习，再申请 OCS。而且，入伍的合同好像比军官的短，我可以先用较短的时间学习，再做进一步打算。我知道我可能有些想法不太成熟，但我查过的资料没能帮我做出决定。

大家好，我是那个和爱彼迎斗争的人。很多人让我来这里分享，所以我就来了！希望能给大家带来一些希望，让大家相信个人的力量（虽然过程真的太漫长了）。如果有人想聊聊怎么摆脱仲裁这种坑人的玩意儿，我随时奉陪！ **编辑补充：** 谢谢大家这么暖心的话。你们不知道这对我的意义有多大，因为这件事基本上都是我一个人在战斗。你们的鼓励给了我力量，我们应该把这看作是共同的胜利！你们也激励我做更多的事情。 想直接看更新的，就跳到🔴🔴往下读。 之前关于这件事的帖子： * 爱彼迎允许房东在我睡觉的房间里安装摄像头 (2022年12月20日) * 第一次更新 (2023年2月4日) * 第二次更新 (我发的) (2023年3月15日) (如果只想看故事，第二次更新里有完整经过) * 案件结束更新 (2023年8月) * 仲裁员判决更新 (2023年8月) 简单回顾一下之前发生的事： 我是一名律师。2022年，我在纽约住了一家爱彼迎。订好房间后，房东才说房间里有摄像头。我要求取消并退款。后面的帖子记录了我争取退款、起诉爱彼迎、进行仲裁的过程，以及2023年几个月里仲裁的准备工作。我赢了仲裁，爱彼迎被迫退款给我，但我花在案件上的100多个小时却没有得到任何补偿，爱彼迎也没有修改或澄清他们的政策（仲裁员说这不在他们的管辖范围内）。然后...... 🔴🔴 **最新更新 - 爱彼迎禁止所有室内摄像头了！！！！ (2024年3月11日)** 爱彼迎正式修改了他们的安全摄像头政策，禁止在所有房源中使用室内安全摄像头！！！ 如果你们关注过我一年多前的遭遇，就会知道我在2022年秋天发现自己要住的爱彼迎房间里竟然有摄像头。 经过近一年的斗争，我终于在仲裁中“获胜”，爱彼迎被迫退还我应得的钱。讽刺的是，我还得为这笔钱交税，所以最后我还是亏了，更别提我花在案件上的100多个小时，以及为了让这个价值数十亿美元的巨头认真对待我而承受的精神压力了。我一直在和记者保持联系，尽我所能地推动，今天终于取得了这个重大的胜利。 但我仍然很生气。他们本应该在我第一次提出他们的政策有多么令人困惑，以及我的遭遇是怎么发生的时候就解决这个问题。他们在声明中明确表示，这次行动的一部分是为了“简化”政策，所以我知道他们听到了我的声音。对方律师说我的观点在高级别会议上被提了出来，所以我知道我的努力是有影响的。但为了得到这个结果，我所受到的待遇太糟糕了，我一直在想，到底怎样才能让大公司认真对待倡导者。 至少，现在我知道我所做的微小努力起到了作用。即使我永远不会得到认可。所以，我要给自己一个轻轻的鼓励。 太棒了！

哎，最高法院驳回了特朗普最后一搏，他想保住自己的财务记录。现在，他的会计师得把他的税务和其他一些资料交给纽约的检察官了。

我们叫他乔吧。我必须给他起个名字，毕竟是我毁了他，但我不能用他的真名，所以就叫他乔。乔是个打老婆的。 我受雇于乔的姐夫，也就是被乔殴打的妻子的哥哥。我的客户也是乔的前商业伙伴。除了“你打我妹妹”这件事，我的客户和乔还有另一个矛盾，一个严重的商业纠纷。我的客户把它告上了法庭，并让我处理这个案子。 乔很自信他的胡说八道和彻头彻尾的伪证会让他胜诉。以前一直都管用。他的胡说八道和拳头，让他和前妻达成了一项不错的和解协议，免除了子女抚养费，所以他可能认为威胁和谎言会再次奏效，但他错了。审判后，我得到了对他的判决，一个巨大的判决，远远超出了他能支付的范围。 乔扭动挣扎，想方设法，但过了一段时间，我已经找到并拿走了他所有的资产。这其实很容易，因为乔根本没有想到后果，所以直到为时已晚才聘请律师。如果我的客户起诉你，你就麻烦了，因为我的客户甚至在你得知他们的名字之前就已经聘请了律师。但乔直到传票递送员把文件扔到他脚下才聘请律师，那时，一切都太晚了。 我像绞肉机一样处理了乔的资产，过了一段时间，乔只剩下一处房产，一栋房子。他紧紧抓住这栋房子，因为它被出租了，是他唯一的收入来源。乔住在未完工的地下室里，靠楼上的租户付给他的钱为生。他在发薪日贷款的地方兑现他们的租金支票，支付高额费用，但这是值得的，因为他知道我会没收他开设的任何银行账户。 乔设法向我隐瞒了他的出租房一段时间，因为它归一家编号公司所有，但我的调查员有一天找到了他，并跟踪他回了家。 在接下来的几年里，乔独自辩护，而我则刺穿了他的公司面纱和他为欺诈性转让所做的可悲努力。但最终，我得到了他的最后一栋房子，也就是他住在未完工的地下室里的那栋房子。有一天，乔出门去买一包香烟，当他回来时，治安官已经换了锁。 “我的客户至少可以住在地下室里吗？”乔的律师对我说，是义务辩护，因为到那时乔已经无力支付律师费了。我认识这位义务辩护律师，他在附近执业。当我和他说话时，我可以从我的办公楼窗口看到义务辩护律师的办公室窗口，就在停车场对面。 “问买主，”我说，“这已经超出了我的控制范围，”事实也确实如此。我告诉乔的律师，新房主（一个提名人，我的客户的一名员工）不会让他回到他那糟糕的地下室公寓。乔，一个曾经在镇上各处拥有这样那样的东西的人，失去了他在地球上拥有的最后一件东西。除了他的卡车。他还剩下他的卡车。 乔的卡车是一辆他到处开的大型耗油野兽。它太旧也太脆弱，不值得扣押，所以我让乔留着它，我很高兴我这么做了，因为现在卡车是乔睡觉的地方。直到他犯了一个错误，也失去了他的卡车。我接到乔曾经拥有的房子的租户打来的电话那天，他失去了他的卡车。 “他回来了，把他的卡车停在了车道上，”租户说，并补充说乔已经疯了。他出于愤怒和怨恨把他的卡车停在那里，然后走进镇子，说他当天晚些时候会回来睡在他的卡车里。 “你能绕过卡车吗？”我问。租户不能。车道被堵住了。我给我在刑事律师时代曾经为之辩护的一位拖车司机打了电话，几个小时后，那辆卡车不见了，停在了其他地方，一个特殊的地方，按照我的具体指示。 “我的客户想要回他的卡车，”义务辩护律师第二天打电话给我时说。 “不可能，”我说。我站在我的办公室里，在停车场上方十五层，向下望去，我猜想我的义务辩护律师同行正站在他的办公室里，面对着同一个停车场。 “但你无权拥有这辆卡车，”他说。 “他无权堵住别人的车道，”我回答。真的太可怕了，站在高处，说出夺走一个人最后财产的话语，那是他在地球上拥有的最后一件东西。我想这一定是上帝的感觉，在他剥夺了一个人的一切，把他送到地狱之前。 “你真的要我为这件事上法庭吗？”义务辩护律师说。 “做你该做的，”我说，义务辩护律师说他的客户第二天会来签署一份宣誓书，然后他们将上法庭要回卡车。但我并不担心。 第二天阳光明媚，阳光普照，早上九点，我望着窗外，啜饮着咖啡。我的电话响了。我接了起来。是义务辩护律师。 “你为什么不告诉我乔的卡车就停在我的办公室外面？”他的声音很紧，我能感觉到他一定气得发抖。 “是吗？”我说，盯着停在十五层楼下的乔的卡车。“我的法警把卡车停放在你的客户可以轻易取回的地方，真是太粗心了。我真的必须和他谈谈。” “真可笑。我的客户要起诉——” “不，他不会。他现在就要上那辆卡车，然后开车离开。我告诉我的拖车司机加满油箱，他还免费更换了机油。告诉你的客户上他的卡车然后开车走，如果我再看到那辆卡车，我会没收它，以满足我的客户判决的剩余部分。”义务辩护律师试图争辩，但我很坚定。然后我放下电话，端起咖啡。 几分钟后，乔走出他的律师办公室，走到他的卡车旁。当他走过来时，我看到他的脚步不再轻快。他已经失去了快乐。乔不是我毁掉的第一个人，也不会是最后一个，但他也是唯一一个我从高处，从我的办公室里亲眼目睹他最终毁灭的人，这是我一生中最有力的经历之一，看着一个男人走向他的卡车，我知道我剥夺了他所拥有的一切，他拥有的最后一件财产，他的卡车，要归功于我的仁慈。 乔开走了，他的那辆大型古老的卡车从排气管里冒出滚滚浓烟。我很确定我再也不会收到他的消息了，而我也确实没有收到。

Okay, so here's the deal: The Anschutz Corporation, which owns AEG (the company behind Coachella), donated $75,000 to the Republican Attorneys General Association (RAGA) shortly after Roe v. Wade was overturned. RAGA is actively working to get anti-abortion AGs elected in states where abortion access is still uncertain. Anschutz claims they've been donating to RAGA for years and that the donation wasn't related to abortion. Philip Anschutz himself says he supports a woman's right to choose. A bunch of Coachella artists, like Billie Eilish and Harry Styles, have spoken out against the overturning of Roe. AEG says they support women's reproductive rights and will cover travel expenses for employees who need to go out of state for abortion care. It's worth noting that Anschutz has a history of donating to right-wing groups, including some with anti-LGBTQ stances, though they've also donated to other causes. In Wisconsin, the upcoming AG election is a big deal, with the Republican candidates all vowing to enforce the state's abortion ban if elected. RAGA is already planning to spend money to support the Republican candidate.

为什么花大价钱投电视广告，而不花钱雇一堆大学生用机器人水军发帖呢？ 德国的Deutschlandfunk写了篇文章，说“网络水军如何为埃隆·马斯克进行辩护和信息引导”，他们在科技博客和社交媒体上活动。 另外，特斯拉的清洁能源部门据说有个专门的团队，在社交媒体上搜索客户投诉，然后要求他们删除评论。 还有一个团队专门处理针对马斯克的负面社交媒体帖子。（马斯克团队你好，你老板该进监狱了！） 研究人员在推特上发现了186个机器人账号，他们一直发布关于特斯拉的正面信息。研究人员说，这些账号“可能缓冲了特斯拉面临的批评，缓解了特斯拉股价的下行压力，并从2010年6月公司首次公开募股到2020年底，扩大了支持特斯拉的舆论”。 社交媒体上机器人账号泛滥成灾。 说真的，马斯克应该因为操纵市场和欺诈被抓起来。他每年都声称要推出一些根本不可能实现的产品，以此来抬高股价，但实际上却根本交付不了。当有人质疑时，他就推出新的“画大饼”项目，或者推迟产品交付的期限。 这纯粹是靠欺诈来拉高股价，应该受到审判。当然，机器人水军会消除异议，阻止人们在社交媒体上采取行动。 我不喜欢和网络喷子争论，但也不想给版主添麻烦，所以我们先来说说“为什么需要机器人水军来压制负面新闻”。 先从欺诈说起！ 比如收购SolarCity这件事。 股价操纵（通过社交媒体）。 每一个指控背后，都有水军可以发挥的空间。他们可以扭曲事实，让亿万富翁获利。机器人水军会制造足够的“疑点”，让人很难抓住这个混蛋的把柄。 如果你认为世界上最富有的公司之一没有“公关部门”，那就大错特错了。 这里有一些学术文章，介绍了这些公司实体（比如大型烟草公司）是如何运作的。现在，他们把同样的技术和手段用在了为马斯克辩护上。 马斯克甚至欺骗了美国政府（还有加拿大政府）。 一位在特斯拉能源公司工作到去年的前经理说，有一个专门的团队搜索社交媒体上的投诉。“他们基本上就是搜索#TeslaEnergy、#Elon等等，任何与特斯拉、能源和埃隆有关的东西。” 这事是真的。

所以事情是这样的：我通过一个第三方平台找了个临时的园丁来割草，以前都没问题。结果这次，我回家准备自己割草，发现我放在后院走廊的割草机不见了！ 我调了监控，好家伙，园丁直接偷了我的新割草机，还想从邻居院子里推走（他以为摄像头是广角）。平台说是盗窃，让我报警处理。他们退了割草的钱，其他的得我自己跟警察处理了。 **后续更新：** * **1小时后：**平台给了我园丁的联系方式。他解释说以为割草机坏了，看我找了他们来就顺手拿走了。现在又说他的拖车被偷了，割草机就在拖车里。我已经报警了，警察说这属于重窃罪，因为金额超过500美元。警察联系了他，让他24小时内要么还割草机，要么赔钱，不然就发逮捕令（我们这小镇的警察很认真）。 * **同一天：**我把这事发到了邻里app，有人私信我说认识园丁的妈妈和姐姐，会联系他们。他们还给了我园丁的ins账号。 * **很快：**有人把视频发到Facebook，认识他的人都在嘲笑他，因为他在社交媒体上用另一个身份（专业人士/创业者/网红）。我本来不想曝光他，只是想拿回我的割草机。 * **还是同一天：**他妈妈联系我，让我删掉视频，说会影响她儿子的生意和名声。我告诉她，我下一步要怎么做，而且她没义务为她儿子的错误买单。我把收据发给她了，让她转给他，因为他还有23小时就要被逮捕了。 * **几个小时后：**他注销了所有的社交账号。现在是晚上9点47，我早上7点会再联系他，看他打算怎么办。说实话，我对这件事不抱希望。 * **第二天：**我醒来发现有36个未接来电，都是凌晨1点到4点的。幸好我开了勿扰模式。我回拨过去，直接是语音信箱。我用Google Voice打过去，能打通了。他把我拉黑了，但我只是想拿回割草机啊。 * **还是第二天：**我也联系了他妈妈，她好像改变主意了，也打不通他电话，就说“你看着办吧”。他是不是想为了一个割草机跑路啊？ * **几个小时后：**我终于通过他姐姐联系到他了。他说他没钱赔偿，能不能让警察给他两个星期筹钱。我说这跟我没关系。我说如果你是老板，应该有信用卡或者账户吧。他甚至说可以免费给我割草来弥补。这不是不打自招吗？ * **又过了几个小时：**警察派人来我家调查，拿了我的笔录和平台的文件。警察说他之前在别的县就有盗窃案底。他们决定直接申请逮捕令。 * **又过了3小时：**我收到了他的短信，这人真是蠢到家了。我已经把短信转发给警察了。 短信内容： > 嘿，兄弟，我是Deshaun。你发了我搬你割草机的视频。我不是故意要偷的。我以为是坏的，帮你处理掉。很多客户都让我帮忙处理旧设备。我试着启动了，根本打不着火。我不会赔偿你扔在院子里的东西。这是你自己的问题，不是我的。至于警察，我有个很厉害的律师，会解决这件事的。你以为这会让我倒霉吗？我会继续赚钱，继续成功，因为上帝保佑我和我的家人。祝你平安！ * **又过了2小时：**他现在已经彻底疯了，我觉得最好不要再和他联系了。他太糟糕了，我把短信发给了他妈妈和姐姐。他需要帮助。 他最新的回复： > 你觉得这是玩笑吗？我不怕你，也不怕警察。这对我来说就是个游戏。你这种人就是想阻止我们成功，典型的“螃蟹效应”。你永远不会懂我的努力和奋斗。我每天都在这样做！我想要多少割草机就有多少，你这种穷鬼，连像我一样的真男人用的John Deer或Cub Cadet都买不起。你就是个小丑，永远都是！ * **可能当天晚些时候或第二天：**这可能是最后的更新了，除非警察那边有消息。如果他被逮捕了，我会发一张他的嫌犯照。我会买个新的割草机，这次买电动的，可以放在家里。感谢大家的陪伴。大家的笑话、互动和积极性让我度过了这段艰难时期。 * **两天后：**警察联系我说逮捕令已经生效了。如果车牌识别系统拍到他的车牌，或者警察拦下他，就会被逮捕。他们没有他的住址，只有他妈妈的地址。我对警察的处理速度非常满意。我不知道要不要把这个消息告诉他妈妈。 * **福利：**我今天买了个新的割草机，还有吹风机、修剪机和快充。是电动的，可以放在家里。 * **又过了2天：**我的一个做公司律师的朋友看了平台的条款，说我很有希望打赢官司，可以免费帮我。他说平台很可能不会应诉，直接庭外和解！ *之所以原来的帖子被删除，是因为我没有举报种族歧视言论。帖子有3500多条评论，大家都举报了，也处理了。这是我遇到过的最奇怪的封禁。难道举报所有种族歧视言论是我的责任吗？还是版主的责任？*

几年前，我除了全职做程序员，晚上和周末还会接点小项目。有一次，有人介绍我给一家大型公司，他们运营着全国各地的大型体育场馆和活动场地，为了方便叙述，就叫他们 MARK-1 吧。 **故事开始了** MARK-1 的一位经理说，他们需要一个简单的管理数据库和用户界面来管理员工的出勤。之前的系统不太好用。我了解了他们的需求，起草了一份详细的规格说明，然后告诉他们，我可以按规格说明来开发这个系统，一口价 2000 美元。他们同意了。 我马上就开始工作，花了大约两周时间，完成了数据库和用户界面，还编写了完整的文档。然后我安排了一次当面演示。 结果，开会的时候，安保部门的人也来了，还问我能不能加一些额外的功能。我说没问题，我可以做。 于是我回去写了变更请求，把额外的功能整合到系统里。几天后，我再次和 MARK-1 开会。这次参会的人更多了，多了两个财务部门的人。 “你能加上 X 功能、Y 功能和 Z 功能吗？” 他们问。 “当然，没问题。” 我又回去写变更请求，添加了这些功能。几天后，我又和他们开会了。更让我惊讶的是，参会人数又增加了，新来的人又要求添加更多的功能。 这种情况持续了大约五轮，我开始感到沮丧，原本计划两周完成的项目，现在已经拖了好几个月。而且，只有在交付（并被他们接受）最终产品后，我才能拿到钱。但我还是硬着头皮，继续完成他们所有的变更请求。 有一天，MARK-1 的经理给我打电话，说她和其他部门的人聊过了，那些部门的人没有参加过我们那些人数越来越多的会议。她给了我一份包含几十个新功能的清单，有些功能甚至需要完全重新设计核心数据库，并彻底修改用户界面。 我终于忍无可忍了。我说：“这完全颠覆了最初的规格说明。我需要从头开始重新设计和构建这个系统。” “那不是我的问题。” 她回答说。 “不，这其实是你的问题。在你支付我目前这个按照我们最初商定的规格说明构建的系统的费用之前，我是不会设计和构建一个全新的系统的。” 短暂的沉默后，她突然给我泼了一盆冷水：“我们不会重新谈判的。你可以认为这个项目取消了。” “事情不是这样运作的。你还是要支付我已经完成的工作的费用。” “不，我不需要。你什么都没交付。你去告我吧。” 然后她就挂断了电话。 是时候开始恶意遵从了。 **法庭见** 我听从了 MARK-1 经理的建议，第二天就去法院提起小额诉讼，要求 MARK-1 支付 2000 美元。几个月后，到了开庭那天，我去了法院，一位仲裁员接待了我。在我们州，法院会安排仲裁员在诉讼当事人到达时与他们会面，看看双方能否达成协议解决纠纷，从而最大限度地节省法官的时间。 仲裁员问我：“你愿意接受任何条件来立即解决这个问题吗？” 我想了想，说：“如果他们现在支付 90% 的费用，也就是 1800 美元，我就撤诉。” 然后他走进了一间侧房，MARK-1 的经理和公司律师正在那里等候。我听到她在尖叫，说他们要么“全额支付，要么一分钱都不付！” 仲裁员回来告诉我这个消息，我说：“我听到了，我很乐意拿走全部的钱。” 他笑着说不行，他们想上法庭。 几个小时过去了（“过去”这个词用在这里挺滑稽的，考虑到法庭的效率有多慢），我们站在了法官面前。我独自一人坐在我的桌子旁，MARK-1 的经理和律师站在对面的桌子旁。 法官让 MARK-1 的经理先讲述她的版本。她开始长篇大论地讲述关于项目、美国企业、苹果派和热核武器的故事，说实话，我从 28 分钟前就停止听了。她滔滔不绝地讲了至少 30 分钟。 然后法官让我讲述我的故事。我并不是故意不听 MARK-1 经理冗长的政治阴谋和爱国主义故事，我实际上是在制定策略。我想法官可能每天都要听很多人在他面前滔滔不绝地讲话。我还觉得，他可能会喜欢一个简短明了的故事，直奔主题，不浪费他的时间。 所以我说：“法官大人，他们同意支付我 2000 美元来为他们设计和构建一个软件系统。我按照商定的规格说明完成了工作，然后在我已经完成工作后，他们决定取消项目。” 就这些。 然后法官问我：“我怎么知道你完成了工作？” 我前一天晚上把规格说明、变更请求、文档和源代码都打印了出来。我从桌子上拿起一叠纸（500 页），递给了法警。“这是我为他们编写的代码，法官大人。” 法警过来想从我手里拿走，法官挥手示意他不用：“不用了，我从这里就能看到。” 然后法官问 MARK-1 的经理：“这是真的吗？” 她看起来有点茫然。“额......是的......” “那么，我判原告胜诉，获得 2000 美元。” **去他妈的，给钱！** 大约一个月后，MARK-1 仍然没有付款。所以我打电话给县治安官，解释了情况。我把法院的判决书发给了他，他说：“没问题，他们会付款的。” 治安官当天晚些时候真的给我打来了电话。他用手机打的，我能听到他和 MARK-1 经理的对话。他告诉她现在就开一张 2000 美元的支票，否则他就要“把你们的电脑从墙上拆下来拍卖，直到还清判决为止。” 我不知道他是否有这个权力，但治安官似乎对 MARK-1 有意见，他很乐意去为难他们。 显然，MARK-1 相信他有这个权力，因为——长话短说——大约 15 分钟后，治安官手里拿着一张 2000 美元的支票，大约一周后，这张支票就出现在了我的邮箱里。

Okay, so here's the deal: Anschutz Corporation, the folks behind AEG Live and Coachella, gave $75,000 to the Republican Attorneys General Association (RAGA) shortly after Roe v. Wade was overturned. RAGA, which opposes abortion rights, had sent out an urgent fundraising plea right after the Supreme Court decision, aiming to install Attorneys General who would push anti-abortion laws in states where abortion rights are shaky. Anschutz Corporation claims they've been donating to RAGA since 2014 and didn't even see the fundraising request. They say the owner, Philip Anschutz, personally believes in a woman's right to choose. Thing is, RAGA was heavily involved in overturning Roe v. Wade. And a bunch of artists who've played at AEG's festivals, like Coachella, have been super vocal about supporting reproductive rights. AEG says they support a woman's right to choose and will cover travel expenses for employees who need to go out of state for abortion services. But the company has also donated big bucks to Republican groups that want to control the House and Senate, and some of those Republicans are pushing for a national abortion ban. Anschutz has a history of donating to right-wing groups, including some with anti-LGBTQ stances. He's said he doesn't support all of their positions. So, while AEG is saying they support reproductive rights and covering travel costs for employees, their parent company is also funding groups that are actively working to restrict those rights. It's a bit of a mixed message, you know? For example, the Attorney General race in Wisconsin is crucial. The Democratic AG is against enforcing the state's abortion ban, while the Republican candidates all want to enforce it. RAGA is already planning to spend a ton of money on ads against the Democratic AG in the upcoming election.

Okay, so my dad got everyone DNA kits for the holidays, and turns out the CEO at my company is my half-brother. Dad probably had no idea, and honestly, it's a shock to all of us. The timeline adds up, and so do the genes, apparently. None of my family has reached out to him, and neither has my dad. I've met the CEO a few times, but he's at corporate headquarters, far away from me. A week after I got my results, HR sent out an email saying we all had to retake nepotism training, and they added a new rule saying we wouldn't get any special treatment, even if we unknowingly had family ties to management. It felt like it was aimed at me. Turns out, no other branch did the training, and my manager even pulled me aside to talk about it. She was vague, and I asked why I was singled out. She dodged the question, so now I'm sure it was about me. I'm fine dropping the whole thing. I'm sure he's as uncomfortable as I am, but it feels messed up that he's using HR to set boundaries. A simple email saying, "Hey, I saw this. Let's just keep our distance at work" would have been enough. Even ignoring it would have been fine, since I wasn't sure I wanted to be the one to bring it up before talking to my dad. My dad's avoiding the conversation too. It's a huge elephant in the room, especially since I work for the guy. The worst part is that he's weaponizing HR to make sure I don't ask for perks. I've been with the company for five years and have a good reputation. At least I did. What am I supposed to do? (Update) Well, he definitely tried to fire me. After I sent in my question, my boss, Katie, told me she knew what was going on and didn't agree with how the CEO and HR were handling it. I told her I was going to try and forget about it, and she supported me. She said to let her know if anything changed. Things were quiet for a week until a major project I was working on got deleted from the company drive. Luckily, I had backed it up. Katie got suspicious and told me to save everything to an external drive and my personal hardware. Sure enough, the project got deleted again. After that, anything I put on the work servers was deleted within hours, including emails. I started sending everything to Katie and keeping copies on a USB drive she locked in her office. Then, after a project meeting where I showed up with all my work on a USB, HR pulled me in because someone anonymously complained that I was "hiding" my work. They tried to write me up, but Katie knew it was coming. She BCC'd me on all her emails with HR and the executive team, outlining her concerns about the CEO and HR's behavior. She believed someone was remotely deleting my work. The company VP was shocked. I didn't even know the CEO wasn't the owner. Katie and I had a call with the VP that day. He told me the owners were being informed and that my job was safe. He also apologized for the write-up and the remote access. That was on a Friday, and the attempted firing was the following Monday. While all this was happening, the CEO's mom contacted my dad. Apparently, my dad was set up as an unwitting donor for a childless couple. My family decided to drop it because we just wanted to know our family history, not get caught up in all this drama. The Monday after my dad spoke to the CEO's mother, HR ambushed me in the lobby and fired me in front of a client and my coworkers. Security escorted me out, which was humiliating. Katie stopped me on the way to my car and brought me back for a video call with the VP and the owners. I explained everything, including the DNA results, the nepotism training, and what I could about my dad. It was awful. I was unfired but asked to turn in my badge. Both the CEO and I were suspended with pay pending an investigation. HR was not happy about the paid suspension. I was planning on looking for a new job during the suspension, but I just couldn't. The CEO didn't come back after the suspension. I was offered my job back with an apology, but I decided not to go back either. I've been freelancing and taking some time off because the last month has been crazy. I did get a generous severance package, so at least they tried to make things right. I know I'm making light of it, but there have been a lot of tears and stress. It was a LOT. I don't like being under a microscope at work, and it was really increasing my anxiety. I was also hurt because I loved my job and my team, and being escorted out by security was awful. My dad feels guilty that I almost lost my job, but none of this is his fault. The people I resent the most are those two HR people who knew they were doing the wrong thing and enjoyed the drama. I heard they're connected to the CEO somehow—like old college friends or something. I hope they get what they deserve.

我工作的地方发生了枪击案恐慌，起因是有人在Facebook上聊起最近被解雇的员工，越说越激动，然后报了假警。 虽然根本没有枪击案，但好多执法部门都来了，到处找枪手。街道被封锁，大楼被疏散搜查，所有员工都被盘问。 结果，我团队里有个同事跟警察说我坏话，说我对公司不满，问过她买突击步枪的事，还说她怕我会袭击公司。 说真的，我最近确实通过公司渠道对一些决策提出了异议，但这不代表我对公司不满。公司鼓励我们畅所欲言，我也只是这么做了。我其实挺喜欢这份工作的，也为自己做的事情感到自豪，而且这还是我第一份能安心表达自己想法的工作。 关于突击步枪，我确实问过一个同事。我住的地方管得很严，买枪很麻烦，而且很贵。那个同事有几把枪，我们以前也聊过射击的事。以前办公室里甚至堆着一堆《枪炮与弹药》杂志。我想说的是，在办公室里讨论枪支不是第一次。 还有，我对所有同事都很友好、乐于助人、支持他人。我每天都在努力工作，尽力帮助别人。说怕我，简直是无稽之谈。说怕我袭击公司，更是过分至极。 我真的觉得这是有人想毁掉我的人生，让我丢工作、被逮捕，以后都找不到好工作。感觉就像被一个共事多年的同事背后捅了一刀。 但另一方面，我又有点同情那个“Karen”，当时的情况肯定让她很害怕，警察来势汹汹也吓了她一跳。而且，最近我们这里真的发生过枪击案。 所以，我对她既生气又理解，但理解越来越少了。 因为这件事，我已经被停职快两个月了，虽然还有工资，但工作岌岌可危。公司安保问了我好几次话，警察也来我家问话搜查。为了让公司“安心让我回去上班”，我还被迫交出了个人医疗信息。 可我什么都没做错啊！ 真是谢谢你了，“Karen”。

Okay, so this is wild. I used to work at a big company, just a regular cubicle job. There was this woman who'd been there forever, practically next in line for a top spot. Thing is, nobody really liked her, especially the guys. She even made one woman cry all the time. One day, I accidentally bumped into her while rushing to give my supervisor something he needed ASAP. My hands were full, but she filed a harassment claim saying I grabbed her butt. After two weeks of hell, I got my supervisor to pull security footage, which saved my job. I was friends with a guy she liked to chat with, even though he wasn't a fan. I gave him a recorder pen and asked him to try and get her to talk about trying to get me fired. He got her to admit to that and three other times she'd gotten men fired with false claims. I took the recording and sent copies to HR, the three other guys she'd screwed over, my boss and his boss, her husband (anonymously), and everyone on the board. Basically, I forced the company to get rid of her because: * Two of the guys were looking to sue. * I was about to sue too. * The evidence was undeniable. She lost her job, her career, her references, and probably her marriage. No severance, no PTO payout. She emailed me calling me an evil bastard and hoping karma gets me. Just to be clear, I live in a state where I don't need consent to record someone. **UPDATE:** After she was fired, they checked her company email and found out she'd been stealing thousands on the corporate card, charging fancy dinners with clients and buying gifts for her bosses. She also used company flight miles for personal trips. Turns out, there were even more false claims we didn't know about, maybe even the reason her predecessor left. HR's digging through years of footage, and about nine people around her were fired, maybe more, plus some suspensions. They've either forgotten about me or are saving me for last, and I'm not getting involved in this mess. They're handing out NDAs like crazy. Lawsuits are happening; two of the guys I sent info to are suing the company hard. One of them almost lost his marriage, so I'm glad this is helping him. It looks like the company is going to prosecute her. Someone said her husband left her, but I don't have proof. My friend who got the recording got a huge severance (nine months' pay) and PTO, and he's starting at a big tech company soon. She sent me another message calling me the most evil person ever and hoping I die. Me: "Okay. How's your husband?" **EDIT:** They're looking at about \$2.3 million she spent on food and flights in five years! How is that even possible? **UPDATE 2:** So, to wrap things up after a week: About 18 people were fired, pushed out, or given severance to leave. She was embezzling money on food, gifts, bribes, and other stuff. She made six such claims, and someone anonymously informed the other people she got fired. One of them was the person she replaced, and he's going to sue her hard. She basically lied to climb the corporate ladder. I had to sign an NDA, but I got a severance of 14 months' pay, plus my PTO and sick time. I'm starting a new job at a tech company soon, so I'm not worried. I also got three letters of recommendation and good references from men who hated her. Honestly, I'm glad I'm out of there. Even though I did nothing wrong, all the women in the office sided with her and were giving me a hard time. I'm talking to a lawyer about the hostile work environment. NDAs don't protect against illegal activity. One person on the board is stepping down, and another is on a sudden vacation. Not sure what that's about. My friend who recorded for me is working at the tech company as of today. He started early and put his severance into savings. My boss (a good friend) got the liar's position and is cleaning house, moving people he suspects benefitted from her schemes to different departments. From what I've heard, her marriage is probably over, and she might be facing prison time for grand theft, defamation, and other stuff. She got my personal email and info from her assistant, who has been fired. She's been emailing and harassing me. I talked to the police, and they said I have the right to defend myself if she threatens me. I have documentation and recordings. She's crazy. She's now calling me a hate-filled misogynistic piece of shit who will burn in hell, a traitor, and a liar. Karma's going to kill me, apparently. Seriously, what the hell? I'm just going to enjoy my time off, play some video games, drink, and relax. This mess is no longer my problem. I probably won't update this anymore. I only did it because of the requests. Thanks for reading and for the support and advice.

大家好，我跟我老公用退伍军人贷款在伊利诺伊州买了第一套房。当时房屋协会出具的评估信上说房子没有任何违规。 结果搬进来三个月，就收到违规通知，说我们“扩建”了车道，没经过审批。 这让我们很懵，我们啥也没干啊！才住了三个月，哪来的扩建？ 后来才知道，是前房主在车道上加了步道，跟房屋协会battle了好几年。 现在的情况是，房屋协会明明签了字说房子没违规，但他们背后的公司又说这房子当初就不该卖，还冻结了罚款。律师联系了这家公司，结果发现是房屋协会董事会想搞事。 就为了8英寸的砖头，又不碍着谁。我们联系了几家律所，但实在不想为了这点破事打几年官司，而且就算打赢了，前房主估计也赔不起。

大家好！ 我是个23岁的英国女生，现在住在纽约。两年前，我妈因为爱上别人和我爸离婚了。我爸当时挺受打击的，单身了一年多。不过现在他又开始约会了，而且他是个成功的律师（53岁），在纽约很容易就能约到比他小很多的女生，甚至有和我差不多大的！ 这事儿让我感觉特别怪异，很难形容。 比如说吧，他先是和他律所里一个25岁的女律师约会，后来又和一个在公司晚宴上认识的28岁投行女约会，再后来又和一个24岁的医学生约会！ 我知道他是个成年人，那些女生也都是成年人，她们有权自己做决定，但我还是觉得不对劲。可能因为我离婚后，一直以为他会找个年纪相仿的伴侣吧。 大家觉得我遇到这种情况奇怪吗？

我不在家的时候雇了个园丁来割草，结果他把我的割草机偷了。 我通过一个第三方服务找的园丁，之前一直没问题。结果这次我回家后，发现我放在后院门廊上的割草机（视频里那种TORO牌子的）不见了。 我调了监控，发现是园丁偷的，他还想推着割草机穿过邻居的院子（这白痴以为摄像头视角很窄）。 第三方公司说这是盗窃，现在我得报警，让警察抓他，把我的割草机找回来。 **更新：** 第三方给了我园丁的联系方式。他居然说他以为我的割草机坏了，看我叫了割草服务，就自作主张帮我处理掉了。 现在他又说他的拖车被偷了，割草机就在拖车里。 我跟警长说了，警长说这已经构成重罪盗窃，因为价值超过500美元了。 警长联系了他，给了他24小时，要么把割草机还回来，要么赔钱。不然就以重罪盗窃起诉他，还会发逮捕令（我们这小镇的警长可不是闹着玩的）。 **第二次更新：** 我把这事发到了邻里社交软件Nextdoor上，有人私信我说认识园丁的妈妈和姐姐，会联系他们。他们还给了我他的Instagram账号。 这事真是越来越离谱了！ **第三次更新：** 有人把视频从Nextdoor发到了Facebook上，现在认识他的人都在嘲笑他，因为他在社交媒体上用的是另一个身份（专业人士/自力更生/网红），还在帖子里面@他。我本来不想人肉他的，我只是想拿回我的割草机而已。 他妈妈也联系我了，让我删掉视频和帖子，说这会影响她儿子的生意和名声。我当时都笑死了。我告诉她我下一步打算怎么做，而且她没必要为她儿子的错误负责。我把收据发给她了，让她转告她儿子，他还有23个小时，不然就要被逮捕了。 **第四次更新：** 他已经注销了所有的社交媒体账号。现在是晚上9点47分，明天早上7点我会打电话给他，问他打算怎么办。说实话，我对这件事已经不抱希望了…… 明天早上见分晓吧！ **第五次更新：** 我醒来发现有36个未接来电，都是凌晨1点到4点打来的。幸好我设置了睡眠模式，可以屏蔽陌生来电。 我打回去，结果直接转到语音信箱了。然后我用Google Voice打，这次能打通了。他把我拉黑了，但我只是想拿回我的割草机而已。 我还联系了他妈妈，看来她也改变主意了，她也试着给他打电话，但他没接。所以她说：“你想怎么办就怎么办吧。” 这家伙难道要为了一个割草机跑路吗？ 过几个小时我再试试。这件事真是让我火冒三丈！ **第六次更新：** 我终于通过他姐姐联系到他了。他说他没钱买新的割草机，要我跟警长说说，给他两个星期凑钱。我说这不关我的事。我说如果你是个生意人，应该有信用卡或者账户才对。 他甚至还说可以免费帮我割草来弥补。这不就等于承认他偷东西了吗？ 我平时很少去后院，除非是割草或者烧烤，但我的割草机已经丢了快一个星期了。 我告诉他最好去借钱或者找家人帮忙，我不会撤销指控，也不会停止和警长合作。 他还有9个小时的时间。 **第七次更新：** 警长派了一个副警长来我家，调查现场，记录我的口供，还从Lawnstarter公司（就是雇佣园丁的那家公司）拿走了相关文件。 副警长说他们查到这家伙在另一个教区（相当于县）有案底，猜猜是什么？盗窃！他们现在决定直接申请逮捕令了。 我一点都不同情这家伙。他自作孽，不可活。 **第八次更新：** 我收到了一条陌生号码发来的短信。这家伙真是蠢到家了。我把短信截图发给警长了。 短信内容： “嘿，我是德肖恩。你发了那个我搬你割草机的视频。我不是故意要偷的。我以为你的割草机坏了，我是在帮你。很多人都会让我把他们的旧设备拉走。我试着启动了，结果根本打不着火。我不会赔你钱的，是你自己把它丢在院子里的。这怪你自己，不怪我。至于警长联系我，我有一个很厉害的律师，他会解决这件事的。你以为这会让我倒霉吗？我不会的，上帝会保佑我和我的家人，我会继续赚钱，继续过得很好。祝你一切都好！” **第九次更新：** 这家伙已经走火入魔了，我觉得最好不要再跟他联系了。情况太糟糕了，我把他的信息发给了他妈妈和姐姐。他需要真正的帮助。 **第十次更新：** 这可能是最后一次更新了，除非警长那边有新消息。 如果他被逮捕了，我会发一张他的入狱照。 同时，我打算买一台新的割草机，这次买电动的，这样我就可以把它放在屋里了。 感谢Reddit一路陪伴。你们的玩笑、互动和积极的态度缓解了我的压力。谢谢大家。 **第十一次更新：** 警长联系我说逮捕令已经生效了。如果车牌识别系统拍到他的车牌，或者警察拦下他后查到他的车牌，他就会被逮捕。他们没有他的有效地址，只有他妈妈的地址。 我对警长部门的办事效率非常满意。 说实话，我不知道要不要把这件事告诉他妈妈。 **奖励：** 我今天又买了一台割草机，还带了吹风机、修剪机和快速充电器。是电动的，我可以把它放在屋里。 **第十二次更新：** 我的一个做公司律师的朋友看了Lawnstarter的服务条款，说这是一个很好的诉讼案例，他愿意免费帮我打官司。他说他们很可能不会应诉，直接庭外和解！ **第十三次更新：** r/wellthatsucks的版主把我禁言了，因为我没有回复和举报那500多条带有种族歧视色彩的评论，也没有告诉大家我也是黑人。 **2023年9月6日更新：** u/redrabbitreader：看来我也被那个版块永久禁言了，因为我问了版主他们为什么要删除评论。太疯狂了。 **2023年9月12日更新：** 一个跟小偷关系很近的人说他最近在德克萨斯州发帖子。看来他是逃到那里去了。我还是会继续更新的。

Okay, so a while back I posted about my husband, Derek, acting weird. I'm on maternity leave and he suddenly wanted me to quit my job, even though I make more money. Then he got all upset, said he felt emasculated, and ran off to his parents' house. Turns out, he'd been watching some of those "manosphere" videos online. His dad called me to give me a heads-up and chewed Derek out for it. Derek came home, apologized, but it didn't feel genuine. We talked about it, and I realized I might have been dismissing his feelings. We've decided to go to therapy, both individually and as a couple. He promised no more tantrums, and I'm going back to work after my leave. I'm cautiously optimistic, but still a bit wary. Things haven't exactly gone back to normal. I've been asked if he's still watching those videos. I don't know. Also, up until recently, he was great. So, it's hard to know what to think. Some people have suggested that he might be cheating. I don't really think so, but who knows? Finally, a lot of you seem to think staying at home is best for kids. Honestly, both of our jobs allow us to work from home a lot. Plus, we can afford a nanny or good daycare. My job will require me to be in the office more, but he was also against his promotion that would keep him away from the kids.

Okay, here's the story, cleaned up and told from the woman's perspective: I'm a 52-year-old woman whose 30-year boyfriend, finally, *finally* proposed. After 25 years of me asking. You can imagine how thrilled I was—I rolled my eyes. He's 53, and he proposed after dinner, saying he's retired now and wants to enjoy life *with me*, as his wife. The thing is, for decades, I'd made it clear I wanted to get married, and he just dismissed me. I felt like I was getting gaslit. We even went to therapy, but it didn't change anything. We have four kids. Raising them in our fancy Southern town was rough. I had to deal with the snide remarks from the PTA moms about not having the same last name as my kids. And the kids themselves were tormented by their classmates, who told them that their dad would rather sin than marry me. His mom was no help, telling him marriage was just a piece of paper and that it would be selfish on my part. For years, he climbed the corporate ladder, and I was a stay-at-home mom, so there was always this power imbalance. I stayed because I wanted my kids to have the best life, and because I was proud to be with a successful man, and honestly, because I loved him. But recently, his career tanked. He's not going to be poor, but he's not at the top anymore, and he left his job with a severance. He wants to relax and live off his investments. Honestly, I wasn't happy with how his career ended or how he treated people, and I'd been considering leaving him once our youngest turned 18. So, the proposal was a shock. Especially since I thought he'd noticed I've been avoiding conversations about the future. He's been talking about downsizing and traveling, but we're not married, so it's all *his* money and *his* house. He noticed the eye roll and was offended. He asked what was wrong, and I told him that now that he's downsizing, *now* I'm good enough to marry. He got angry and accused *me* of being disrespectful because he's no longer an executive, and then he implied I was a gold digger. I walked out, telling him I might just go find a respectful relationship because I obviously don't know what respect is anymore. **Update:** We hadn't spoken since that fight. I knew better than to sleep in the bedroom, so I went to the guest room. The next morning, I told him how dismissed I'd felt over the years, and that I wished he'd treat me like I was valued, instead of acting like he could always find someone prettier, better, and just as loving around the corner. I apologized for the eye roll, but said that if he wanted to get married, I wanted a quick timeline and for him to actually be happy about marrying me. He finally asked if it was about the money and security. He said that being an executive's girlfriend required things of me, but if I wanted to work, I could have. He said I wasn't grateful enough for the position his career put me in. He also said he wasn't mad about the eye roll and that he wasn't going to be emotionally blackmailed. He said the ring was mine to do what I wanted with, and that he would provide for our daughter, of course. He doesn't want to get married anymore, but he's still planning on traveling and said I could come with him. But that traveling was non-negotiable and I would have to get a remote job if I wanted to work. I asked him if he would support me getting an associate's degree, but it would have to be in person, not remote. He told me that if I wasn't traveling with him, he wasn't going to go without sex for those periods of time. I was shocked by his callousness. We fought again, and I told him that we're both getting older, that I've supported him through health issues, and that he's wrong if he thinks he can just find someone else who will be as loyal as I've been. I'm looking for a way out. I'm tempted to just say I'll travel with him and try to get a remote job, but I'm so resentful that he still needs to have all the power. I don't know what my value truly is, but I have to believe there's something better out there. **Second Update:** It's been over a month, and my life has completely changed. And not for the better. I'm really not doing well, but I still have hope. I have hope in my kids, employers, the courts, even my kids' dad. I have hope in the love that I have given my kids' dad so freely because I was raised to believe even those who don't appreciate the love I've given them will eventually self-actualize and pay it back. Ever since I tried to show him I valued his freedom and gave him his space, he's been angry. He started picking fights over everything, from how fast I do housework to my spending (which was within the allowance he gave me), and then he cut off my allowance almost entirely. He even asked for the ring back during an argument. I took the advice from the comments on my previous posts and refused to leave the house. Just a few days after our conversation about the engagement, he accused me of ignoring him and demanded that I leave. I said no, that I deserved to be there. He responded by having a lawyer send me a notice to vacate that day. It happened so fast, I was too shocked to react. My kids were torn between thinking he was bluffing and telling me to just leave. But now he's filed for eviction. It's up to the courts now. I tried to find legal aid, but the person I spoke to was cold and implied that my status as a mom and partner wouldn't protect me from eviction. I've been applying for office jobs, but my friends tell me to be kind to myself. My adult kids suggested I apply for SNAP (food stamps), but I haven't out of shame. They said that if I do and we no longer live together, the government will help me collect child support. My grown kids said they can't risk upsetting their dad. My oldest told me a gas station was hiring for the night shift and that he'd try to help once he graduated. Just when I decided to be grateful for the job, they rejected me after an interview where I felt I spoke well. That hurt. But I keep having hope because every day there are new remote and non-remote jobs posted, saying they'll train the right candidate. I'm applying to every corporation, hoping that one of them will take a chance on me, give me an interview that I'll ace, and see me for someone pulling herself up. I know he wants me to beg, but I don't know if that would make him drop the suit. I just don't know anymore. I'm in my corner of the house, trying to keep things normal and applying for jobs like it's a job. I don't know what else to say but that ends my update for now. I maintain hope and dignity. **Relevant Comments (and her responses):** * **Commenter:** Have you talked to a lawyer about common law marriage? * **OOP:** The woman at legal aid said there's no hope because it's Arkansas. And because around the time my second child was born, my boyfriend made me affirm in writing that, despite living together, we are not married, are not holding ourselves to be married, and I shouldn't expect him to give me any support (besides support for minor children) if we break up. Unless, of course, we did end up marrying and registering a marriage, which he promised to consider at that time. He did this when he expected to take a job in a common law state (but that didn't end up happening). * **Commenter:** Amazon warehouse work, they "literally hire anyone." * **OOP:** I just think for me to be committed as something I need to be passionate about it and it would likely be in a marketing field. At this time I just don't think it would be a good fit for my needs and where I want to go from here. I have applied to around 100 marketing jobs for big corporations and small ones as well as remote. Ideally I'd like a remote position since I work better when I am comfortable in my setting. * **OOP:** My skills of competency are mostly around marketing and maybe something like investor relations, which my boyfriend's sister was in for around 8 years before she got married and changed to another role.I love creating beautiful imaging and speaking to people, even if they are strangers ( I know it doesn't come off that way because I've been through a lot emotionally lately).I don't think I would be a personality fit around tradespeople. We would likely have nothing in common ever and they run the gamut in terms of background that made them choose trades over an office job that climbs the corporate ladder. * **Commenter:** Temp suggestions * **OOP:** Thanks for the suggestion. I have been up and applying for more jobs again, but was hoping to have a job where I wouldn't necessarily have to be in person because I still have a 15 year old at home. She turns 16 soon, and her dad promised her a car, but he's known to retract or delay gifts so I don't know. I am also concerned because a lot of parents who send their kids to daycares are often the ones who go to work sick, and then their kids are also sick and are sent to daycares.I don't have the best immune system and have suffered from health issues and sensitivities as of late, so I do not want to get something and worse to pass it on to my daughter. * **OOP:** His former colleagues sent him a letter (unsigned) saying how they were glad the board of directors pushed him out. He wants to leave the country soon to travel. I don't think he cares. Some of the women in my group have heard my story and either said they support me but cannot do so employment wise or reputation wise, or gave me coupons for blowouts and botox and then after I continued to show how desperate I was for help, they have been planning events without me.

我真搞不懂公司怎么能这么蠢，简直是自掘坟墓。 我工作的医院，竟然爆出医护人员偷药的事儿。然后，某个天才想出的解决办法，竟然是全员强制药检！ 拜托，我又不是医护人员，还是远程办公，八竿子打不着。唯一一次去医院帮忙，也就是抬了下担架。 上周二，我收到HR邮件，说我被“随机选中”药检！让我周四去，让人盯着我尿尿。还说没得商量，想改时间就打电话。 说实话，我也理解要查，毕竟病人需要止痛药。但方法也太多了吧！ 我直接把邮件转发给领导，说：“合作愉快，但我肯定过不了。” 她回了个脏字。 为啥过不了？因为这次药检查的可不光是止痛药，是所有东西！ 我在的州，我做的事儿都不违法，但检测结果肯定会让机器炸锅。我吃处方药治多动症，吃大麻软糖缓解失眠，每天狂喝水，还吃肌酸补剂。搞不好，我还会在路上吃个百吉饼。既然要完蛋，不如完蛋得彻底点！（听说罂粟籽会假阳性，不知道现在还算不算数。） 随便哪个，都能让数值出问题，导致假阳性或直接阳性。而且政策还规定，不管当地法律，只要阳性就开除！没道理可讲！ 所以，我还是按时去了。排队的时候，看到一堆人紧张兮兮的。终于轮到我了！ 我进了个房间，里面有个男的，感觉他今天看了太多小弟弟，一脸生无可恋。当时才早上11点！房间很简陋，几把椅子，一张桌子，角落里还有个臭烘烘的移动马桶。 他问我名字和部门，确认我是本人，然后问：“你有什么问题吗？” 我摇摇头，说：“合作愉快。”他挑了挑眉，没说话。然后，我们就尴尬地站着。我有点认生，他需要亲眼看着我尿进杯子里。估计他比我更尴尬。 最后，我终于挤出足够的尿液，他写上我的名字，我就解放了！ 结果，他们自己就能检测，速度很快。周四上午11点半我离开，第二天早上9点，我的账号就被禁用了，权限也被撤销了。 周五明明一堆会，结果一个都参加不了。 我赶紧给领导发短信：“我好像被炒了，什么都登不上去。” 这次，她发的脏字是大写的。 周五没人理我，今天早上收到领导短信，说我的权限恢复了。我赶紧登录邮箱，发现一堆人问：“你到底来不来开会？” 但最新的邮件，是周六早上发的： 第一封：HR副总裁决定另谋高就。（走好不送） 第二封：所有待检测的员工，无需再提交样本；之前被停职的员工，全部复职。感谢大家的耐心。 据说，这次药检，有近30%的员工没通过，直接被停职。医疗部门和IT部门的比例更高。这导致两个结果：第一，医院无法正常运转，周五简直一团糟。第二，一些IT人员业务不精，违反了HIPAA（健康保险流通与责任法案）。 估计我们这儿的律师要忙一阵子了。 我估计没人死人，但我知道，一些需要尽快进行的手术被推迟了，因为人手不够。我老板也是医生，有好几台手术都被改期了，因为找不到合格的手术团队。 *总结：医院有人偷止痛药。HR总监决定全员药检。结果10%的员工没通过。医院停摆一天。HR总监辞职或被炒，其他人放了一天假。

生活巨变，感觉糟透了。上个月发的帖子后，我的生活发生了翻天覆地的变化。之前我不是说了嘛，我追着他求婚25年，30年的男友终于求婚了，但我当时翻了个白眼，嫌他动作太慢，而且那时候他也不再是高管了。结果，他直接撤回了求婚。 我真的希望这次能告诉你们一些好消息。 我现在的状态很差，但还是抱着希望。希望来自周围人的善意——我的孩子们，雇主，法院，甚至包括我孩子们的爸爸。也希望我曾经无私地给予孩子爸爸的爱能有所回报。我从小就被教育，即使那些不珍惜你爱的人，最终也会醒悟，并回报你。 事情是这样的：自从孩子们的爸爸指责我想把他变成情感上的囚犯后，我就想证明我重视他的自由。我给了他空间，让他看到我没有他也能好好生活。 谈话之后我就开始这么做了。但他却很生气。自从那次谈话后，他就开始对我吹毛求疵，对我做家务的速度、我的花销（都在他给的零花钱范围内）各种挑刺，还把我的零花钱削减到几乎为零。吵架的时候还让我把戒指还给他。 我认真听取了大家的建议，特别是有人说如果他逼你走，就不要离开家。可就在我们谈论完订婚没几天，他就找茬跟我吵架，说我无视他。他说他想让我滚出去。我说不，我理应住在这里。结果，他直接让律师给我发了通知，让我当天就搬走。事情发生得太快，我当时都懵了。 孩子们也不知道该怎么办，有的觉得“爸爸只是吓唬你”，有的劝我“还是走吧”。现在他已经向法院提起诉讼，要赶我走了。我试着找法律援助，但接待员态度很冷漠，暗示说我作为母亲和伴侣的身份并不能保护我免于被驱逐。 我试着投简历找办公室的工作。朋友们劝我对自己好一点，说即使被拒绝，也会有更好的机会在等着我。孩子们建议我去申请SNAP（食品券），但我很羞愧，还没去申请。他们说如果我和“爸爸”不住在一起了，政府会帮我追讨抚养费。 孩子们说他们不敢惹“爸爸”不高兴。我大儿子告诉我，有家加油站招夜班员工。他说等他毕业后会帮我。我本来想，有个工作就该知足了，结果面试之后还是被拒绝了，我感觉我面试的时候表现得还不错啊。这让我很受打击。但我还是抱着希望，因为每天都有新的远程和非远程工作发布，还说会培训合适的求职者。 我几乎把所有公司都投了一遍。希望其中一家能给我个机会，给我个面试的机会，让我好好表现。让他们看到我是一个努力奋斗的人。我知道我的男友想让我求他。但我不知道那样做是否能让他撤诉。我真的不知道该怎么办了。 我现在就躲在房子的角落里，努力保持正常，像上班一样地投简历。不知道该说什么了，这次就更新到这里吧。我会保持希望和尊严的。